Standing Rock update: I'm experiencing less sheer Terror for the last two days than the day or so prior. There are many times the last 15 years.......

Standing Rock update: I'm experiencing less sheer Terror for the last two days than the day or so prior. There are many times the last 15 years when I have been in terrifying situations but not nearly so terrifying is this. The prospect of five to ten years in a Savage military prison system.

Why less terrifying? Yes, the material situation becomes more terrifying each day. The police and military come closer, the 22nd comes closer, now they're blockading certain materials a harbinger of blockading food and water.

I have learned many ways of dealing with such Terror all of which has been failing me up until 2 days ago. But yesterday morning one that I have not used before popped into my mind. By the way, when I awaken is the most terrifying time. Whatever mental perspective had given me some peace of mind the day before is not there when I wake up in the morning. Just the sheer physical existential Terror.

What popped into my mind mercifully as it turns out yesterday morning was something that Gandhi asserted and lived, non-cooperation with evil is a duty, and the United States of America government at virtually all levels and forms is consummate evil.

I have no idea how long that thought will be helpful to me but it continues to be helpful.

This morning when I woke up I needed even more help and it occurred to me to do what I have often done in the past but not for a long time, to attempt to summon to the man Jesus, king, Gandhi, Mandela, and to try and imagine what they would think about me being here planning to stay until I am put in prison rather than to cooperate with Injustice.

Welcome to the club, is essentially what I experienced. It was not jovial, it was not congratulatory, it was very matter-of-fact but very clear, so far, anyway. And comforting. I'm surely clear that being with them Is more important to me than anything else I can think of including avoiding 5 to 10 years of torture.

The sense I get from the man Jesus is, where do you think I'd be? The implied answer being, standing at Standing Rock waiting to be crucified by the state. Yes, there were years when he avoided doing that but it finally came time to stand and let the state show what it was made of, pure evil. That's how it is looking for me.

An added benefit, an added help, came later. the focus of my life in recent years has been the children and people of Palestine, particularly Gaza, and their Moment by moment torment by the state machine. They have not been on my mind in recent months. I've been preoccupied with things here and with my own selfish Terror. But today I've been brought a little additional peace by realizing that much more than ever before I now stand with people like this, live in actual solidarity with these earlier victims of American state Terror. And that feels right to me. I'm sure you can imagine.

I have zero hope for any of us in the future. I have written this but it continues to be the fact, and that I can still function at all amazes me. But I can. I would never have known that standing with what my soul tells me is right with no hope of helping anyone by doing so, I would never have known that I could function on just that. It seems that I can.

Envy is what I feel so often when I notice someone my age dies in their sleep. How merciful that would be. No, not by my hands. Why? I don't know. But it is not my inclination. I expect I'll serve out my sentence willingly. The Green Mile.

Standing Rock update: the state is immoral resistance is Duty. Non-cooperation with evil is a duty. In creators eyes, the pure morality of my imagination, the land on.......

Standing Rock update: the state is immoral resistance is Duty. Non-cooperation with evil is a duty.

In creators eyes, the pure morality of my imagination, the land on which I am situated was given to human beings, two leggeds,  prior to any colonial forced creation among the Dakota tribe of a western notion of nationhood. Original Dakota Sioux individuals are standing here on this land and have declared those that stand with them sisters and brothers entitled to the to the same land as full sisters and brothers. Yes, this matters not. This Savage state will torment us like evil boys crushing so many bugs.  But I still may find that I'm unwilling to flee this hopeless, completely hopeless Showdown. that I will refuse to cooperate with the evil of the white Colonial settler Empire that has created such comfort and pleasure for me until recent years.

I whip saw between one moment leaving as quickly as possible and the next moment staying. What I have just written above has me staying, for the moment.

I believe that the choice to stay is virtually certain selection of years in Cruel, Savage, evil, satanic prison.

But for the moment I can hold on to the words above.

When the state is immoral resistance is Duty. Non-cooperation with evil is a duty.

This is a most agonizing, anxious, miserable time in my life. It is also probably the closest I have come to understanding what life feels like for billions of my underprivileged sisters and brothers who for decades have been victims of the state violence. I take little comfort in that but I acknowledge it none the less.

By the way, I have learned a new purpose that I am finding helpful, for prayer. Yes, still, I have no illusion that anyone hears the prayer. But when I pray for my expected persecutors, when I pray for those that do evil on purpose or by accident, I find that it creates a positive mental state for me. It is a way of Imagining the world that I want, behavior in that world that I want. And it helps me increase my understanding for and empathy for  those who are so bent on evil . In that it is no more than a psychological survival technique. But it may also prepare me mentally and spiritually as a better instrument for trying to help be a catalyst for others to bend toward good.

I have no hope for a better world. I lost that hope years ago. often I lose my footing and regain that hope but that is a mistake. The Titanic is going down, it hit the iceberg of near total amorality many decades or even centuries ago.

If there were hope in the world then staying here for a showdown, in creators eyes, between the forces of good and the forces of evil, those standing peacefully and prayerfully for a habitable future for our children, standing lovingly, a showdown between people doing that and people driven by Mammon, pure greed and hatred, such showdowns would be instrumental in creating a better future. But I see no hope in this. Not in 2017. If a tree falls in the woods and no one is there to hear it it doesn't matter if it makes a sound. It makes no difference.

Earlier today I was momentarily held here by the realization that this is inclusive of people here in this camp that are among the most decent that I have ever encountered. for the moment it had me staying to stand with them. But I don't know what they stand for. We don't talk about it much. Each person has their own reasons.

Incidentally, for the first time in decades I find it difficult if not impossible to imagine a loving creator of us all. Partly, as I try to do so I encounter such a sense of disgust that Creator would have for humans which results in such active disinterest and dissociation that my imagination is unable to go further and find any available love in Creator, which I used to be able to do and have inform my walk. This makes things much more difficult.

I am terrified of the material future that awaits me. Terrified. With all of my Powers, all of my focus, developed over so many years, it takes all of my abilities to put one foot forward in front of the next. Dread does not begin to sum up and I feel about my personal future. I am not proud of this. But I admit it. And make no mistake this is so small, so petty, so selfish on my part. I can barely find the imagination to care about anyone but myself. I'm so sad about this. But so far it's the best I can do. These are very trying times.

Standing Rock update: this update has been long overdue.. These last ten or fifteen days have been among the most difficult that......

Standing Rock update: this update has been long overdue..

These last ten or fifteen days have been among the most difficult that I have had in many years. Something continues to physically sap my strength and it seems to have to do with my lungs. But even if I were fit,  the world is being revealed as such a hideous nightmare that it makes finding my footing very difficult.

It may be teaching me, it is teaching me, it may be teaching me important lessons that only such extraordinarily difficult times and conditions could do. We live here physically in a police state. Machinery of police violence deliberately encroaches on us closer and closer every day. We are not treated as Citizens by the state. We are treated as viruses. The state does not care about citizens it cares about money. Does anyone not see this?

Have I been wrong for so many years or is what I've been doing wrong for this particular time? What I'm questioning is this, has my way of being to place my body in the way of harm to the most vulnerable, has that been, or more importantly, does that for the future speak the best way for me to serve? Certainly I do not think that it has been either bad or a mistake and certainly not a terrible mistake. But is it the best way for me to serve? the good farmer may live on a floodplain and occasionally have to get in the way of the flood, but it is not the way of Being for the farmer to be in the way of the flood. It is the way of being of the good farmer To plant and tend good crops.  the only crop in which I have any interest or hope is loving in the world.

It appears that for those of us that decide to stay in this Camp until the 22nd we are offering our lives to jail and or prison. Is that the best way for me to serve? I expect more informed information and Analysis will be forthcoming in several days to make the decision a bit clearer for me.

I don't know if it's cowardice, fear, wisdom, fatigue, worry, self-absorption, insight... that has me leaning toward moving on rather than jail or prison. All those negative things constantly work on me. Maybe the positive things work on me as well, they probably do.

Several years ago as I recall, I may have been deep into a hunger strike, I asked a question of future children that I have asked many times, What do you most want from me,  from us? And all of a sudden instead of the usual answer, a habitable Earth, I heard a different answer. Give us more loving, in the future. Send us more loving. I know this to be the more correct answer and the more radical answer. It does not preclude fighting as I have been for a habitable Earth but it does not necessarily equate to doing that.

The most radical answer each second is to do that which might Spark the most loving in the future . of that I am certain.

That could mean that I should offer myself for prison on the 22nd. Right now that is not feeling like the way. as I have written recently for it to be clear that jail and prison is the best way to serve much more clarity in terms of strategy, facts on the ground, support, Would be necessary then is currently visible although that may come visible within the next few days.

Life here physically, materially, in this world that is in Hell Fire, is almost unbearable for me, but more than bearable each moment as I devote each moment to being love in the midst of this community as I do with each waking breath, hours of dishes, sleeping in the water shed tending fire so that the water does not freeze. assisting with Construction. Doing Duty in the compost toilet. Helping to clean up abandoned structures, refuse, Etc.

My beloved friend Joe, one of the most wonderful Souls I have ever met, a volcano of contribution,  an architect and designer and Builder, has a vision for an Earthship which for each person residing there literally starves the black snake to death. He with help from people like me has been trying to help it get a foothold in this region and so far Petty jealousies and lack of Vision on the part of others has prevented this. The dream does not die Within Me. I want to see it happen and will do what I can to help if I see a way of doing so.

I am profoundly and morbidly afraid of the material future that awaits me. I'm not proud of this. But I admit it.

All out war is being waged Upon Us, on all decency, on all decent people. If.....

All out war is being waged Upon Us, on all decency, on all decent people. If we are not at risk by being nonviolent combatants, periodic risk of death, periodic risk of prison, then we are complicit, we have already surrendered the future of our children without a fight.

In bed most of two days and my body still wants to go back there. So weak. Went........

In bed most of two days and my body still wants to go back there. So weak. Went to medic and the nurse says my lungs sound very clear, no indication of pneumonia. Received a second round of vitamins and some good calories. Food is more difficult each day to secure here.

Updated: this was yesterday: The reasons that I need to leave ocheti, that I need to leave sacred stone, that I need to leave this fight seem endless. They constantly assault my nervous system brutally, painfully, endlessly. In.......

Updated: this was yesterday:

The reasons that I need to leave ocheti, that I need to leave sacred stone, that I need to leave this fight seem endless. They constantly assault my nervous system brutally,  painfully, endlessly. In no particular order. At best at best at best there is a snowball's chance in hell that will have any impact now on the universe. There reached the point when the Titanic was going down and I believe that point was reached quite a long time ago for us and for America, and I have written of this in recent years. This Camp Prides itself on Unity. There is virtually no Unity. If there are 300 people left in the camp there are almost three hundred reasons why each individual is here and no one will admit this, no one will talk about it. Would you have your son or daughter operated on by a surgical team of 20 people where there was no Unity,  where all 20 had their own idea of what kind of operation it was let alone how to conduct themselves?? Would you expect the Pentagon to win a war or even a scrimmage if all of the people had different missions? Nearly 300 people left, in one camp? In a dozen camps. Again, no Unity. Some of the camps are identified by tribal name. Some of the camps are unidentified accidentally and some deliberately. Deliberately unidentified is the little click of arrogant youth that have been empowered by someone with money I presume to think that they are superior, smarter, more able than everyone else, that make plans, that are making plans, in secret, while swearing that no one is in charge that everyone is equal. oh and the many / age, hormones, physical strength... There is  much sick superiority , egoism, discrimination. I doubt that they understand the sickness they're involved with but it's cancer. Did I mention no leadership. I did not decry that there is no management, that is not what I mean by the word leadership. Leadership is the opposite of management. leadership is the ultimate role of service both in humility and in scope where it is the role of the leader to understand all of the above and to work the magic of knitting people and camps together so that there is Unity so that it is one group. There is virtually none of that nor is the problem acknowledged but rather it is buried. The ignorance of non-violent struggles in history is Breathtakingly overwhelming, only more breathtaking By The ignorance that it's important. Would you allow your daughter to be operated on by a surgical team that had not been to medical school and really didn't care what people that prior had succeeded in the operation knew or had practiced?   and knowing all this by virtue of being a lifelong student and practitioner of high-stakes nonviolent change,  that all this spells near certain Doom of any material positive outcomes,  do I not owe it to my beloved sisters and brothers here to walk away as a means of stating my concern so that they could act accordingly or at least be informed?  oh, and did I mention that all indications, all indications, all indications are that even our closest friends have already accepted That if Morton County and Trump's government come in to slaughter us that there is nothing they can or will do to stop it?

As of this moment there are two primary reasons why I am likely to stay:

A.  the man who I Revere above all, as did the Hindu man Gandhi, Jesus, we are told that Jesus said when speaking in the direction of who he experienced as his father, Creator, we're told that he said, of the few Souls you gave me I have not lost any. Never has this scripture struck me as significant until several days ago when it became very significant. Maybe I can help a little, Martin Luther King said a person is not equipped to live, is not living, unless they know that which they would gladly die for. a coal in the many fireplaces that keep us from freezing to death here in sub zero fahrenheit weather, a coal that is dark in a fireplace is certainly a coal, but it is not a live coal from which life can be derived or multiplied. There are dozens and maybe hundreds of live souls in this Camp, quite possibly more than are collected in any place on Earth right now. Yes my abilities are laughably pitiful but for the moment and for the last day or so I find it sustaining the idea that it is worth my life and everything I can do to try and protect those coals and keep them from going out in the chest even if The fascist regime physically snuffs out in life in prison or with bullets or both.

B.   my sense is that Oceti cannot Escape its role in human history As the origin point of any and all future fight, any and all future nonviolent battles. We have had the attention of the world. I suspect that how we individually exit, not to be confused with what material outcomes we achieve or do not achieve, but whether or not we effectively model standing for something more important to us than our own lives will have an impact on all efforts going on on the Earth today and in the future. I do not retract that I think that years ago the Titanic on which we all live past the point of no return, but I don't know that. And I suspect that not knowing that I will find the strength to with some gladness stand on my responsibility to be what infinitely small little part I can of a proper stand against insurmountable evil that the world needs to see and to copy.

Today:

Today I think differently. Today I think that what we owe the next seven generations is to leave Oceti.  The bright burning coals here, so rare, dozens or more, is something to celebrate, but it is reason to leave. We must find the courage to face that our courage, our willingness to gladly die for Mother Earth and for future Generations is not enough. The Litany of deficits in the first part of this post, we must leave and if we really love mother earth, if we really love Creator, if we really love the next Generations then we must dedicate ourselves to learning the lessons that let us fill these deficits. We need to study. We need to reflect. And first of all we need to admit our failures despite our best efforts so that we and others might learn. Or is the lesson of this Camp to be the glory is in the bright burning coals allowing themselves to be snuffed out for some Glory? I think we owe Creator, Mother Nature, the next seven generations, our sisters and brothers today more than this.

Tomorrow?

I don't know yet.

I believe that I love goodness, that I love loving, enough to suffer and die for it.

I believe that I love goodness, that I love loving, enough to suffer and die for it.

Trump is simply the obvious part of the war by the 1% now on the rest of this. Elysium is no longer a fantasy in the future. Hunger Games is no longer a.....

Trump is simply the obvious part of the war by the 1% now on the rest of this. Elysium is no longer a fantasy in the future. Hunger Games is no longer a fantasy in the future. Everyone that does not go down quietly either into the Matrix or into the cocentration camps will be destroyed in body. Our option besides being sheep is to refuse to have our spirit destroyed before its time. I hope, I suspect, that I will so refuse. The rumors spin around this camp. For all any of us know there will be a brutal sweep any moment and yet it could not take place for weeks, we don't know. We are down to a skeleton crew. People are working 20 and 30 hour days literally. Point being the choice is between leaving, curling up in balls of fear due to all the likelihood and rumors, or simply to serve as a decent human being,  Manning the compost toilets, washing dishes, cooking meals, splitting firewood, hauling firewood, keeping the water from freezing, cleaning up the camp so that the water is not polluted when the floods come, moving or preparing to move in anticipation of the flood..... Most of the people I see, the spiritual core, are making this latter choice,   simply to be an unarmed, undefended, under attack, decent human member of this small local community and of the community that comprises all creation. I believe that for those of spirit this is really the only choice,  for each of us here in the camp, for each of us on 2017 earth. There's no time left to hold onto self-preservation spiritually. What energy we have simply needs to go into being decent human beings moment-by-moment. Only creator taking Mercy in some unimaginable Miracle will Stave off our individual destruction. And I think the only sanity, the only joy, is in surrendering to that truth and even embracing it because it is truth. James

Who is psychotic? Trump or we tens of millions of Americans that live normal lives while he totally destroys our children's future?

Who is psychotic? Trump or we tens of millions of Americans that live normal lives while he totally destroys our children's future?

Depression is highly adaptive, which is why it is available to us as a species. If it doesn't kill you you grow, is true in my experience. At least temporarily, and......

Depression is highly adaptive, which is why it is available to us as a species. If it doesn't kill you you grow, is true in my experience. At least temporarily, and probably it will continue to lift, I am emerging from the darkness. Depression properly experienced is a massive slow down by the nervous system alerting the user that the information, assumptions, status on which one has been operating are subject to extreme question,  and may need radical revision. Depression attempts to force all this to be considered. Many weeks ago I reported that for the first time, well, the second or third time, in my lifetime I have not felt like a complete alien. That I was among many spiritual Jedi by whatever name here at Standing Rock. My role was to try and encourage their flame to grow even brighter. The vast majority of what appeared to me to be spiritual Jedi have left the camp for reasons that I think are understandable but not necessarily good. I had not adjusted my role. The answers that have come to me in these last several days as to what my role should be equate to moving from being kindling to help more wood Catch Fire to resigning myself to being a spark, a match, a coal that aspires to remain hot in the event that tinder or dry wood emerges sometime soon,  or in the distant future. This is a huge adjustment. But I am already making it. And as I said, the profound Darkness seems to be lifting.

I'm in a profoundly dark place. Psychologically. Spiritually. I find....

I'm in a profoundly dark place. Psychologically. Spiritually. I find almost no Spirit of loving left here Standing Rock. Already I have found almost none in the world. Such incredibly Dark Times. Been through this sort of personal darkness before. Each time I have made it through. I suspect I will this time. I never know how it will happen. I certainly do not know this time. I suspect it will have to do with attempting to be good, anyway. To be loving, anyway.

We are completely unarmed here. In that sense we are completely peaceful. The extent of the weapons used, and I disapprove of this, the extent of the weapons used has been taunting.....

We are completely unarmed here. In that sense we are completely peaceful. The extent of the weapons used, and I disapprove of this, the extent of the weapons used has been taunting and snowballs, and destroying razor wire on disputed,  stolen, land which is protecting an immoral pipeline that is part of the war on all creation. There are strong Rumours that we will be attacked tonight by Cowboys. And if not tonight soon. The local police have pubically bemoaned the fact that there are locals that they cannot control. There are locals that they inflame and will not control. Think Bull Connor during the Civil Rights Movement. The threat of this and the actuality are hugely racist against natives. I am not inclined to run from this. I may have finally lost my hope of saving the world, end of the world being safe too, forever. But I suspect I will never lose my will to stand against Injustice.

When I try to check in with Creator, when, in my imagination, I try to understand what Creator is thinking, what I get is that Creator is through with us as a species. We've had seven.......

When I try to check in with Creator, when, in my imagination, I try to understand what Creator is thinking, what I get is that Creator is through with us as a species. We've had seven thousand years and all we do is torture each other. All we do is hate. The exceptions prove the rule. Creator is done with us. Creator will not exterminate us. Creator will simply let us do it. Creator takes no joy in that. But Creator is tired. The experiment has failed.

I have used all of what little abilities I have to try and facilitate a world-changing stand at Standing Rock. I see conclusive evidence......

I have used all of what little abilities I have to try and facilitate a world-changing stand at Standing Rock. I see conclusive evidence that I have totally failed. I came here perfectly willing to die in the hopes that my contribution joined with others could be a spark to ignite the world. I see not the tiniest hope of that. No one's fault. Our culture simply does not produce the people that can do that. I plan to leave this disputed land as early as possible although that is substantially limited by my fragile vehicle that has hardly any range in the cold. If I had a car I would likely be gone tomorrow. With my vehicle it likely will take as long as a week.

Am I hearing Creator say to me, "Let It Go?"

Am I hearing Creator say to me, "Let It Go?"

There is only one revolutionary Act. It is rarely executed, rarely attempted, by an individual let alone a group. It can......

There is only one revolutionary Act. It is rarely executed, rarely attempted, by an individual let alone a group.  It can have an infinite variety of forms. The only revolutionary Act is to spend one's breath being as good as one's imagination, conscience, Soul, heart... and as examples throughout history, show us that we can be. Everything that is not that is more of the same and again can take an infinite variety of forms. If I imagine that there is an all-wise, all loving, creator of us all, as I do imagine, when I have the presence of mind to keep myself in the Gaze of that creator it very much helps me behave in the direction I have just described. And so far in even very trying times it gives me the psychological peace described in the twenty-third psalm,  and the joy that can only be described as psychological heaven despite whatever material Horrors May in fact be the environment. I suspect that almost all of the great creative religious Geniuses such as Jesus, Buddha, and others, were trying to help us find this way. That is, I think there is nothing original or clever in what I'm saying.  "Thy kingdom comes, as thy will is done, on Earth, as we would do in heaven."

If Europe and the rest of the world does not launch all out non-violent war on the United States they are as f****** stupid as we are.

If Europe and the rest of the world does not launch all out non-violent war on the United States they are as f****** stupid as we are.

My prayer, this International Day of Prayer for our water, for standing Rock: Creater, it seems to be your way to reveal yourself on pure blank things. You.....

My prayer, this International Day of Prayer for our water, for standing Rock:

Creater, it seems to be your way to reveal yourself on pure blank things. You revealed yourself in a pure blank Universe now filled with multitude. On a clear blank Earth now filled with multitude but diminished by our two-legged mass destruction. Your great artists who reveal you on pure blank canvases. You reveal yourself each year emerging through pure white snow in the spring and summer time.

For us two Leggeds, though it seems cruel to us, you gift some of your two-legged with the infinitely joyful privilege of becoming pure, of becoming innocent, of becoming cleansed, such that they can be again your canvas, but this time painted, tormented, destroyed, with the savagery, cruelty, insanity of some of we, most of we, two-leggeds so that our savagery can show itself that all of us might choose a different path.

You at certain times in history  have cleansed souls and brought them together on a bridge in Selma. You cleansed such soles and brought them to a square, tahrir Square, in Egypt. To a salt works in India https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yrHNig2aIjQ .  You cleansed a soul Malala in Pakistan. You brought and cleansed Souls at Standing Rock and brought them into a river to let the horror of Empire clearly etch itself.

And it seems you so cleansed all these Souls that they understood themselves as Souls in a simple vessel and they were glad to offer their vessel as a canvas for the savagery of our society to paint itself that the perpetrators might see, that the billions of sleeping on Lookers might see in time to turn away from Armageddon for all future children.

Creator, if I am seeing clearly through your grace, then, if it is your will, make of each and every one of us that remain at Oceti, at sacred stone, at Rosebud, and each that you bring here, each and every one of us each and every breath, make of us that pure vessel for your spirit, that knows it is pure spirit, and that gladly offers its vessel, each and every one of us, every breath, to be used as that Canvas, even if painted with, prisoned, even if cruelly destroyed, gladly, that the next seven generations possibly have a planet that can provide a decent life, and that each and every child ever born on a broken planet or not, has the opportunity to see what You look like, because you are Love, you are Unarmed Truth, you are Unconditional Love, and each of us that fulfills this prayer becomes that prayer for a child in the first generation or the 7th generation or Beyond of being reminded of what you look like and are thereby given the opportunity to return to your loving Embrace, your infinitely joyful, infinitely peaceful Embrace,  here on Earth, regardless of what is materially in-store.

James, who lives only to be your servant, if even so poorly.

It seems to me that a bloody Civil War in the United States is almost inevitable and that Victory by those with the guns, the fascist hordes, my sisters.....

It seems to me that a bloody Civil War in the United States is almost inevitable and that Victory by those with the guns, the fascist hordes, my sisters and brothers all, is nearly inevitable. The only hope I see is if Creator sees fit to use some of us in the way discussed in the following prayer, at this link https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10210285521407351&id=1620551416. And unless that happens now and ignites what little Humanity is yet available in America to ignite, before it's scurries into self-protective caves, in the form of acquiescing to the machine as happened in Weimar Germany, unless that ignition, unless those people show themselves and are used as a blank pure canvas for the atrocities to begin to manifest, it will be too late, the one-sided Civil War will take place, and it best there will be hundreds or thousands of years of Darkness on Earth. At best.

Courage, kindness, or prudence? All three I'd say. And pragmatism and support of high output community members. Caught between threats from.....

Courage, kindness, or prudence? All three I'd say. And pragmatism and support of high output community members. Caught between threats from North Dakota oil Junkies and local Native Casino profit Junkies both eager to throw us in jail I have become concerned that I would be an extremely unpleasant cellmate without a shower in three months and laundry for my one change of clothes. Silly? Maybe. A tremendous expense but I've Justified it, being here at the local casino hotel for a night, by offering to 10 or so people the opportunity to come and take a shower and to an extremely high output, crucial, fellow Doer to spend the night. This individual is under tremendous stress, having sacrificed to the breaking point personally, and a third fellow will be sleeping here as well.

For 15 years or more I have devoted myself to, within my imagination, living each breath within the will of the creator. I believe that my next step......

For 15 years or more I have devoted myself to, within my imagination, living each breath within the will of the creator. I believe that my next step which I will attempt beginning now is to live not just within the will of creator, but, in my imagination, each moment, within the presence of creator. I don't know if this is possible. I don't know if it is productive. But I suspect that the answer to both is yes and will begin the attempt now.

Trump is an extraordinary gift to us, the gift that keeps on giving. Which.....

Trump is an extraordinary gift to us, the gift that keeps on giving. Which one now? He has given us the inarguable fact which has always existed, but he has given us the unvarnished fact, that the government cannot and will not save us. Only we as Breath by breath, generation after generation, fully active fully participating citizens can do that. No, we won't accept the gift. We don't love anything, including our children that much, but he gave us the gift none-the-less.

"If they want to shoot me that's totally fine with me." This I found myself saying as I sat for several.......

"If they want to shoot me that's totally fine with me."  This I found myself saying as I sat for several moments in the herbal tent receiving heat from a fire prior to heading into a different unheated kitchen to do my 22nd hour of dishes this last four days. It's 15 degrees Fahrenheit, and getting a bit chilly. Chiller still tomorrow and then it begins warming up into the twenties again. Several folks in the herbal tent were discussing the story that dapple fired three rounds of live ammunition last night, one of them shattering a car window. I don't know if this is true. It's fine with me if it is, and I would be delighted if they shot me as I stand right now. They are brutal. They are Savage. They are destroying everything, all future, for the Next Generation let alone the next seven generations. The only force that can stop them are tens of millions of cowardly sideline sitters that begin to see atrocities visited on bodies like mine in time for them to wake up. Yes, they probably will not wake up. But that's the only way it would happen and I would be delighted to be one of the First atrocities. I'm a good man. I do nothing but love all of humanity all of creation as do many of the people here in the camp. What I wish to happen to me is what those in tahrir square wished would happen to them if necessary, what those on the bridge in Selma wished would happen to them to protect their progeny, if necessary, what those at the darshana saltworks expected would happen to them to give a future to their progeny. Why the f*** would anyone not want to do this? I know why not in my head but I totally don't know why not in my heart. The heart can never know why. Only the mind can fabricate the ridiculous distractions and excuses. The infinite infinite infinite infinite infinite excuses. As per this massively important post below I want a darshana saltworks March. I want thousands of us to announce a week prior that we are Marching to the drill pad, that we are taking equipment to destroy the equipment at the drill pad, that we are taking ladders or whatever to get through the moats that have been dug around the drill pad otherwise making it inaccessible. that we expect not to succeed in reaching the drill pad. that we expect in exercising our human and legal right to protect the commons of our children and grandchildren that we will be executed, maimed, or at best put in prison as terrorists for the rest of our days. And that we are fine with that. That we know that only by exercising our rights, our duty, as dignified parents, brothers, sisters, Aunts, Uncles, grandmothers, grandfathers, can we enable the full savagery of the corporate Frankenstein monster machine to become evident so that the f****** cowardly happily confused onlookers on the sidelines wake up and see the machine headed directly for them in time to stand up and stop it. There is no other way. I don't want there to be another way. I am simply grateful to see the way and will do whatever I can to bring about what I have just discussed above. I hope that you read and watch and Ponder the following post and share it. And if you don't you bear the responsibility. I'll continue to do my part but I can't do yours.  https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10210253054515699&id=1620551416

Until we liberals hold ourselves to a higher standard than the standards we hold our opposition to we are rightly going to fail, we are rightly going to keep going down in f****** flames.

Until we liberals hold ourselves to a higher standard than the standards we hold our opposition to we are rightly going to fail, we are rightly going to keep going down in f****** flames.

I implore you to watch this, and the other clip that I just posted on my Facebook page. I don't know that this exemplifies what we should do. I know.......

I implore you to watch this, and the other clip that I just posted on my Facebook page. I don't know that this exemplifies what we should do. I know that it keeps replaying in my soul and mind as the type of thing we must do. We must become the canvas on which the savagery of the empire can be seen by the hundreds of Millions of willingly confused onLookers that they come off of the sidelines on to the right side. Our side. Now. We must be the small canvas on which the awaiting atrocities are painted so that others can see in time and give the next Generations some tiny bit of future worth living. If not now, when? If not here, where? If not us, who?

https://youtu.be/yrHNig2aIjQ

https://youtu.be/WW3uk95VGes

Trumps executive order authorizing the pipeline is yet another godsend. Will we take the opportunity? What.......

Trumps executive order authorizing the pipeline is yet another godsend. Will we take the opportunity? What opportunity? The opportunity to immediately, prayedfully, deeply, imagine how we escalate our fight here at standing rock in ways that fully comply with prayerfulness, peacefulness, courage, and surrender to the needs of the next 7 generations over our own.

Courageous violent revolutionaries of today in Washington DC, Standing Rock, and elsewhere {black bloc, instigators, inciters, taunters, vandals, destroyers, compulsive violators....} : just a question, if you're so f****** courageous then........

Courageous violent revolutionaries of today in Washington DC, Standing Rock, and elsewhere {black bloc,  instigators,  inciters,  taunters,  vandals,  destroyers,  compulsive violators....} : just a question, if you're so f****** courageous then why are you parasites on nonviolent action? Why so regularly do you leech off,  embed disinvited in,  the protests and actions and protections of non-violent people? Why do you so rarely confront the police by yourself?  In my day it was called hiding behind apron-strings. Is it not only those you claim to oppose that you wish to destroy, but nonviolent action itself,  and the nonviolent Warriors? You arrogant f****** assholes. You don't want change. You don't want Revolution. You don't care about the next seven generations. You want to get your rocks off. You want an adrenaline rush. You want to feel like Heroes when you're nothing but infantile, lazy, dishonest cowards. People are supposed to grow out of Tantrums by the time they are three years old. You have unconditionally surrendered. You have unconditionally surrendered. Your violence hands the keys to an infinite Arsenal, Keys that Trump and his gargoyle hordes are just aching to use to vaporize and or enslave us all. You are infiltrators. You may not work for dapple or you may. You may not work for the state, or you may. Whether or not you get a paycheck there you absolutely work for them. You are dishonest intellictual cowards. You laughably distort the history of non-violence to fit your yearning to act out like spoiled children. Badly behaved, badly brought up children. Would that the armies of the world had your intellectual dishonesty and cowardice, they would have given up on the first tests of gunpowder let alone nuclear weapons and the world would be at peace. They would drop one bomb, see that they had not won the war, and give up on using bombs like you have given up on nonviolence which has barely ever been tried throughout history. But alas at least those in the Army have the some intellectual honesty. Some courage. Some decency. If you want to go out in a blaze of glory and unconditionally surrender the future of the next seven generations, for decency sake go do it by yourself. Stop leeching off of the people with real courage,  dignity, compassion, respect, self-control, empathy, Humanity, loving. Those of you that strongly disagree with what I've just written I wonder if you will have the decency, compassion, courage,  intellectual honesty to tell me why. If I am wrong I wish to know so and I will loudly proclaim it if I am helped to see.

Pbs: Affordable water may soon dry up, especially if you live here

http://www.pbs.org/newshour/updates/affordable-water-may-soon-dry-especially-live/

***** Erica Chenoweth: The success of nonviolent resistance

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YJSehRlU34w

If there is a proper roll for prayer, and I think that there is, though almost never never never used, the proper role for prayer is to connect with one's soul, the......

If there is a proper roll for prayer, and I think that there is, though almost never never never used, the proper role for prayer is to connect with one's soul, the deepest wisest part of our nervous system that we cannot control but we can learn to listen to. This is the Seat of Wisdom. It is the only place in such dark times that we can reliably turn to for how to guide our own lives although the soul demands that we responsibly access all important available information.