June 22 re Death Fast - To a great, great friend, offering major assistance toward securing a laptop,

 

To a great, great friend, offering major assistance toward securing a laptop,

 

I'm crying with the shocking receipt of your email.  Why? Kindness. Goodness.  There is so little on Earth now.  No, you need to hear me.  It is not desperation.  Maybe it should be, but it is not.  It is not my business what the world does, or what the Creator does.  It is not my business what any individual does. Ever. Thank the Creator this is true, has been a Truth, an invariable, inviolate truth in my DNA for many years now - 7 or so?  

 

But sadness? Frustration?  Longing for things to change, for the next 2000 generations to have a chance?  Deep, deep, deep fatigue?  Yes.

 

This morning it was clear to me, but beginning last night, it was clear to me that there is zero threat to the status quo of environmental Armageddon.  Zero.  I've encountered our most hopeful citizens, quite intensely these last 2 months.  I expected to encounter no one, but I was mistaken – folks from Occupy, thought leaders in the anti-global warming movement, and YOU.  And by last night....

 

The computer being stolen was a profound blessing.  I get soooooooo caught up in the centrally crucial function of being a tough as nails cheerleader (93% of all True leadership?) that there is much that all the 'noise' that I make drowns out.  I'm not meaning to be at all cryptic, but this is the best I can communicate it.  So, the theft of the laptop was a gift, an immense Gift of the Creator - 'LOVING, SHUT UP, AND LISTEN, LOOK, WATCH, SEE AROUND YOU.'  And what I saw, in part, I wrote just seconds before your email arrived this morning, with detail to follow as I record the attendant video logs and essays for book 2 - Personal Trainer – 

 

 

·        098. If I fight battles, but am not possessed by a campaign, I'm ranting, not serving. No vision for winning, no hope

 

·        099.  I refuse to not be a True threat to the status quo of needless suffering and death, whatever it costs me

 

·        100.  No unviolent army, no hope

 

·        101. All I want is a clear view of the battlefield so I know how to best fight

·        102. I'm exactly like a prospector, in a really unpromising stream, prospecting for the least glimpse of Heart(s)

 

 

I make zero assumptions of anyone, ever.  If I ever share with someone a need of the campaign, I only do so if I perceive that I can do it without laying on pressure.  100.000000% of my hope is in the Heart of people, and anything and everything else is instead of Heart - expectations, pressure....

 

The ONLY thing I want, bottom line, is for the next 2000 generations to have a decent shot at Life.  

 

I got a really good and unexpected look at the prospects of that here in DC, power capital of the world, and, well, the next 200 billion people are screwed – thanks to the clinical Deadness of the left, right and center.  I didn't expect to see that even clearer still, but omg, I'm so grateful I did.  All I want is a clear view of the battlefield so I know how to fight.  And these last 8 weeks have given me way clearer than I had going in even.  The next 200 billion, are screwed.

 

Point?  As I woke in thought this morning, I'm clear, and excited with clarity that 80% confidence level this  is time for me to return to the death fast.  'Till enough are seen dying for it, global warming won't stop.' 'When enough are seen dying for it, global warming will stop.' I sent a link yesterday or so of the 17 year old 'child' that addressed the global warming conference in Rio, what, 20 years after the first Rio conference. WE'VE DONE SQUAT.  Watch the vid.  Trilby I think her name is?

 

It was more like 98% likelihood of immediate death fast, clear to me, comforting, to begin within the week, and then your email this morning offering major help with the computer / online situation.

 

If I had a competent laptop, and wifi, and a backup drive or 2 -they stole those too- the vermin can't get $.50 each for them. the truth is, that might change the equation.  :-)  LOL, and I'm not sure I want that!    The notion, unexpected, that return to the death fast within the week is exactly right, was, well, clear, and comforting - a clear track to run on again!

 

The Dell Vostro would open up a whole new avenue for me fighting - internet, blogging, staying here in front of the Can. Embassy pressing the issue, and taking the Tracking Plan B blog to the next level.  And, preparing for death fast Jan 1, by when the DC climate club will have proven once again that, well, they are a club, not remotely an unviolent army – Lincoln's McClellan or Britain's Neville Chamberlain; nor is DC Occupy, which shows near zero chance of becoming as serious threat to the status quo; no disrespect to anyone, but they are here to play, play at activism, not to hold themselves to the standards of the situation, what's needed, the potent activism. (Writing to you just gave me (reminded me of) characteristic 100.  No unviolent army, no hope.)  Jan 1, 2013, the year to stop the BS, and for citizens to stop watching the club play, and do it themselves.

 

The requirements of that Dell Vostro avenue are - The vostro, should be under $800 with tax.  I spent much of the last 2 days, massively crippled on this netbook, but limping, fully researching, new, refurb, scratch and dent, other manufacturers.... the vostro, new, from Dell would be the weapon.  However, the greatest torture of me for years now, since Thomas death, has been the wifi umbilical to the internet - Clear.com - pretty fast, cheaper, and for the next 2-3 months, maybe way cheaper - $25 per month for the next 2-3 mos, then returning to the normal, still way cheaper $50/month.  Since Thomas death it has been at risk of dying for lack of funds, almost every month.  It is month to month, no contract, just a cred card that they charge, and can be cancelled any time.  But the computer war option, vs immediate death fast, would require that wifi be in place, handled, taken care of, off my mind. It is just too draining to wonder month after month if something is going to save it - so, that's another $300 through year's end.  I'd need 1 or two backup disk drives.  Just started researching them.  The vermin got a 500gb drive, but now that those files are gone :-( I don't need that big - probably another $130 bucks total.  That's about $1350-1400 bucks!

 

And finally, and this I'll probably need whether it is to be death strike now, or computer war now -  the gift of a used self-inflating sleep mat that I also use on my little folding chair is an incredible comfort gift, but the valve on it is increasingly leaking – This is the item .  Regular, not large or xl.  $60 or so if one shops carefully.

 

Did I just ask for all this; any of this?  Do I expect you to do it?  Will I think less or more of you if you do or don't?  NO.  NO.  NO.

 

NO.  NO.  NO.

 

I'll ponder all this as the day(s) go on.  You too.  In your magnificent Heart, that I see now, these recent months.  What a Godsend.  (crying again)

I NEED YOUR READ AND COMMENTS OF BOOK 2 - INSHE Personal Trainer.

 

Loving u, either way, forever, no matter what

 

Ps: This heat is quite debilitating, slowwwwwwwing me down.

 

Computer stolen - I'd forgotten how close to the edge I, uh, live.

Computer stolen - I'd forgotten how close to the edge I, uh,  live.

I think the Creator just told me that it is time to resume the death fast.  Seriously.  8 hears or more he/she's had me devoting what industry paid $200,000 per year for, to humanity, and not only has it cost me everything material, but there isn't even support for the basic weapons I use - computer and internet - $50 per month with clear - $600 per year, a sword of damaclese that's hung over my head for years now, month by month - may be falling tomorrow, finally, the 24th.  That's a pretty clear Call Home to the Creator, don't you think? Duh. 'Hey man, no one down there gives a f*#%K about the next 200 billion people.  Time for you to come Home.'

Wow, in 8 hours I've gotten about 3 hours work done, and been away from the canadian embassy 3 hours of that, relegated to the little netbook I've used as backup only, drawing power from a cafe that really doesn't like me here. Wow, what a wound, for the probably $50 the vermin got for the computer. Literally.

To replace it, Dell Latitude E6520 is $1800 bucks.  Out of the question.

Battery, battery life, battery life... fast enough are the requirements of the weapon I need to fight.  I'm without a home, office, available power, so without long battery life, I'm beyond crippled.  And few computers provide what is needed.

I have a netbook that I use for extra battery life, while the Dell was charging.  Too slow for internet work, but ok for word or excel, and that work is just about done for me.  Argh.  I'm using it now, and it is almost unusable.  10' screen.

The dell had 8 hour battery life while online.

The cheapest that Best Buy has is about $480-500 for 4 hours life, 15" screen like the dell.

With that, I'd at least have half the day with a computer fast enough to do internet work and the video work I do.  Tho I'd be shuttling 2-3 times a day for recharging rather than the once.

The correct solution is about $750-$800 from Dell - the Vostro 3350, 13.3" screen, 10 hour battery life, fast enough for internet research, posting, and 

INSHE Personal Trainer - 097. Each day I fail, my client's suffer and die; no matter how hard I tired; no matter how good I felt attempting.

INSHE Personal Trainer - 097. Each day I fail, my client's suffer and die; no matter how hard I tired; no matter how good I felt attempting.

Computer Stolen Tonight - Street hazard

If anyone has a spare long-life (6hr plus) battery, or $3-500 bucks they want to spare, now would be a good time to let me know.

 

I figured it was a matter of time.  Yes, I could have been more careful, and I could have been a lot more careful.  I ran to the bathroom, covered it up as everyone here does, with no problem.  They must have been staking me out.  They got massive of files, but unless they are real computer savy, it is useless - password protected, broken, non-functional keyboard.  Without the problems they couldn't have gotten $200 for it, but to replace it would be $1600 bucks for me.  But, hey, I can't be choosy.

 

Loving

Fw: INSHE Personal Trainer: 096. I reject lip-service from myself, others, for the deadly delusion that it is

INSHE Personal Trainer:

096. I reject lip-service from myself, others, for the deadly delusion that it is

details to be added soon.

Loving u

URGENT. WATCH - Rio - Environ Conf: "there is already a palpable feeling in the corridors that the serious business is over."

urgent.  WATCH - http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=karQQb-B8Uk

Rio - Environ Conf: "there is already a palpable feeling in the corridors that the serious business is over."

IF IT IS TO BE, IT US UP TO WE, THE CITIZENS OF THE WORLD.  WE, THE INSANELY HUMANE.  DO WE ANY LONGER EXIST?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-18527141

June 19, 2012: Death Fast Restart - Global Warming's Death. Fast.

"Plans are worthless.  Planning, is everything."  General Dwight D. Eisenhower

"I'll allow just one tyrant in my life, the still, small voice, within."  Gandhi

"There is no God higher than the Truth.... Truth is God."  Gandhi

"I consider myself a soldier, though a soldier of peace."  Gandhi

"Those with the privilege to know, have a duty to act," Albert Einstein

Gandhi was adamant about 'oaths,'  He took many, against eating meat, to continue on a hunger strike until his demands were met, etc.  Odd, I think, because for him the greatest living human was Leo Tolstoy, who's writings on the contents of the original Greek Gospels created the man we know as Gandhi, and central to Tolstoy's translations is the commandment - 'Take no oaths,' one of only five.

In any case, as I've often written, stated and lived, for me there is only one thing that does not change - the ultimate value of life, and all of creation, and the ultimate, all encompassing duty, the ultimate joy of devoting one's life to the ultimate service of life, Heart, Creation.  And at this the most consequential moment in history, the only unalterable in my life, is to do my part with every breath, of preventing the Global Warming Meteor from destroying the future of the next 2000 generations; even if I have to base it on the profoundly inadequate information we are provided by the environmental intelligencia - 'we're in trouble,' in dozens of scholarly articles every day, is not .01% of the information we need to responsibly act.  Everything else, tactics, strategy, what to do in the very next second, are open - whatever seems most promising, most useful, most hopeful at that instant.  "I'll allow just one tyrant in my life, the still, small voice, within."  Gandhi

The death fast began, well, I don't remember when, but about 60 days ago or so.  I did not expect by today to any longer be alive by today, June 19th.

But the Death Fast continually changed the field, and that continues.  "Plans are worthless.  Planning, is everything."  General Dwight D. Eisenhower.  The Death Fast was, and remains, the only realistic hope to be seen anywhere for averting environmental Armageddon.  This came clear to me about 9 weeks ago, and has only gotten clearer, since.  The next generation bunker buster is the correct weapon for destroying Iran's deep labs.  Both are obviously the correct weapon.  The time and place of deployment, however, are variable.  And neither, is sufficient, but without them, mission accomplished is impossible.

This first Death Fast, has changed much on the field of battle where Loving fights.  I expected to see zero change, zero, within my time  But I was incorrect.  Among the changes:

1. Allies, and maybe even a partner or two have emerged.  I say maybe out of caution, and respect.  "I think she said she 'yes' to marrying me, but I want to give her time to be sure.'  This changes things dramatically.  What might we do together that Loving couldn't by himself.  Loving, who has been on the field longer than they, if he is around a bit longer than just another 40 days or so, can they profit in strength and speed from that?
2. A group of 'supporters' quickly emerged, and mostly departed as they came to understand what it was about.  But have all fled, permanently?
   
3. Two books, never earlier contemplated, but suggested indirectly by pleas for written source material, have been drafted and made available - "Global Warming's Death. Fast," and "A Personal Trainer for the Insanely Humane Unviolent Warrior DF."  Should Loving remain alive for now, to promote these, explain these, tour with these, to help others modify one or both for wider audiences, use them to recruit for a later Death Fast restart? Where would the travel funds come from?  The organizing support?
   
4. Among those who have been touched by the Death Fast, one of the most promising by far has spoken with fiery passion of leading a mass 40 day hunger strike here in DC in about 6 months time.  Would my help there be useful; more useful than some other options?
   
5. Another of the most promising potential INSHE warriors has also has had thoughts of spending the next 6 months recruiting for a Death Fast, and has long argued that Loving could be better serve by working along with, and doing likewise.
6. "Plans are worthless.  Planning, is everything."  General Dwight D. Eisenhower.  Loving has for the first time gained slight, but meaningful direct access to the global warming club (no, the club members, my brothers and sisters all, utterly don't see themselves that way; club members never do, but they clearly live and work by club rules, not real-world rules).  And, well, if there is a plan other than Death Fast in front of the Canadian Embassy, they've been perfectly effective in hiding any trace of it from Loving; Amadinejad would be envious.  There is no plan.  There is no 'failure is not an option' team - think Apollo 13, unless it is the best kept secret in DC.  And, those most qualifed by scientific and visibility, are ferocious, relentless, brilliant... about not stepping up to this.  Given factors 1-5, does Loving re-devote to doing what Hansen, Brown and Romm refuse to do, and so far, refuse to even help in the tiniest way with?  "PLANNING, IS EVERYTHING,"  Eisenhower.  Oh, they have regular forecasts, weather reports, wishes, demands, wants, directives.... BUT ZERO PLANS. ZERO PLANNING. ZERO 'FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION' TEAM.  And without these Environmental Armageddon is a CERTAINTY.  If not Loving, who?  If not now, when?  If not here, where?  As pitiful an effort as it would be, does Loving do what he can to assemble, centrally from the writings and talks of Hansen, Romm, and Brown, an updated Plan B 5.0?  An evolution of the Tracking Plan B blog?  TPB
7. "Those with the privilege to know, have a duty to act," Albert Einstein.  Well, Loving has more experience and success turning around failing, desperate situations than anyone on the scene regarding environmental Armageddon, except Obama. But all on the stage so far, like Lincoln's McClellan, indicate they'll talk, write, demand, but  by their relentless, brilliant behavior they make clear that they won't plan to win, and they won't fight to win. So, praying every nanosecond that those already on the stage stand up, does Loving, regroup, and given factors 1-6, make yet another pitiful attempt to fill the gap - Planning and Leadership, giving himself a little more time to do so?  AS THINGS STAND, THE VACUUM IS PROFOUND, AND COMPLETE. Four of this country's finest citizens, as things stand, will be among the most reviled people in all of history - Pr. Obama, Lester Brown, Joe Romm, and Jim Hansen, in that order.  Albert Einstein, "those with the privilege to know, have a duty to act."  Blogging for the umteenth year in a row is not acting.  Saying to audiences all over the world, year after year for a decade or more, "War time speed!" and adding that this means 'call your senator,' , is, well, acting at war time speed;' it is hard to imagine how the fossil fuel industry could do more harm than this.  And Pr. Obama, like all three others, even he can't stop it.  But he can do his part of the job.  He will be remembered as the President, the most powerful man on the planet, that decided to finesse, rather than openly declare war to unhide the future obliterating 1. hidden costs of carbon fuels, and 2. the future eviscerating subsides to coal, oil, fishing, agribusiness....  His job is leadership, and instead he, along with the other three, have decided that Nevil Chamberlain is to be their model.  We're doomed, if they don't step up.
   
8. From all day long watching 2 years ago December over the Health Care fight, I've recalled the end of the year political wrangling, horse trading window that exists year end, particularly this year with the Bush Tax cuts again to be decided on.  [Right?]  The Bush Tax Cuts are an abortion.  However, environmental Armageddon for the next 2000 generations is worse.  Even if 1-7 didn't pan out, would a Death Fast restart be more advantageous now, or mid November, in however small an attempt to bring moral pressure to bear (the ENTIRE hope in any case) at that more opportune time - end of December?
   

The two options I see are:

1. Return to Death Fast this week, as intended when the temporary halt was initiated 3-4 weeks ago so that the books could be completed.  There remains about 4 more days of work before the editing is done, audio versions, and video versions completed.

2.  Postpone the Death Fast restart until year's end, early to mid November, here at the Canadian Embassy.  I expect that if this option in pursued my primary base of operations will remain here, in front of the Canadian Embassy, 24/7 - keeping the flame alive in however small a manner.  However, earlier there may have been talk of some R&R in PA, and or in Santa Cruz.  Such options would be considered.

I don't know what I'll decide these next few days.  I'd prior announced that input from those who had read both books deeply, would be deeply welcome, and needed.  That remains the case.

Loving

Well, these and other

RETRACTION: Fw: Legal attack by Lester Brown, Earth Policy Institute?

[Do we think that our brothers and sisters on the right, the deniers, 'see' their denial?  Although not the final word on the subject, Chris Mooney's 'The Republic Brian,' a meta-study of recent research makes it clear - pre-cognition the brains of the right, and the brains of the left, liberals, progressives, environmentalists... PRE-COGNITION screw with the input.  For each group, their brain knows full well, what they want the 'truth' to be and it automatically renders as absurd, outrage, plot, conspiracy, lashing-out... the 'news' it doesn't want to hear.  I've taken license here, you decide if it I am incorrect.  The right (Is it slander, malice, lashing out, that I say so?) murderously denies the climate science.  The left murderously denies the personal price that many will have to pay in terms of funding, reputation, relationships, jobs, income, and even their personal lives to give the next 2000 generations, 200 billion people a planet they can do more than just barely survive.]

About 2 hours ago one of the two thought leaders in the environmental movement who's basic humanity and even courage I've come to respect, told me essentially, that me thinking that EPI would come after me legally was absurd.  There is a price for shutting a member of the human family out of the process, as I've been by the established activist movement in general, and the anti-global warming club more recently - a good, decent, honest family member will not 'go away,' right?  Would you?  If you haven't seen the movie, massively disturbing, massively courageous, "John Q," you need to.  Denzel Washington.  Now, the bad family member will rant, carry on, be concerned about themselves.... Pitiful.  But the good family member will never, go away.  They will constructively, and relentlessly hold themselves, and all on whom their 'family' depends, to the highest standards.  That's Loving, and everyone alive, and the next 2000 generations are my immediate family.  Yours too.  Right?  Immediate Family, right?  Americans, Africans, Bangladeshis....

The point?  Deprived of any and all inside information, kept out of the adult conversation, I WILL ACT, as best I can.  If my begging for better information is ever responded to, no one will be more joyful than I.

So, one of two in the anti-global warming club who's moral integrity I've been shown reason to respect, quite angry, quite disappointed in me, said my guess at possible EPI, Lester Brown is absurd.

I accept that, and I retract, now being in possession of what I hope to be better information, what I emailed earlier today.

Loving

----- Forwarded Message -----
From: Start Loving <start_loving@yahoo.com>
To: Loving [Start] <start_loving@yahoo.com>
Sent: Monday, June 18, 2012 10:22 AM
Subject: Legal attack by Lester Brown, Earth Policy Institute?

Good morning. 

FYI -

If you see me disappear, go missing, or my web sites come down...

Several recent emails from Lester Brown's Earth Policy Institute raise the specter in my mind that they may consider legal action against me and my work for sharing non-confidential comments from Lester Brown in email exchanges.  If you view my book on Scribd you will see it in the first few pages. 

Global Warming's Death. Fast. DRAFT 6 M

Resurrecting the Insanely Humane Unviolent Warrior in You. Fast. Draft 1 G

May I suggest you download, READ, and prepare to distribute widely should the worst transpire?

I had hoped that Lester Brown and EPI were bigger than this.  I still hope that Lester Brown and EPI are bigger than this.  But if my worst fears are born out, they may come after my sites to which I've devoted years, and in one case a decade to, from which I've derived not a penny, nor would ever do so, and in the process they would deprive the future of an honest attempt to be of service.  Maybe this is not their concern.  They and we may learn much now.

In as much as I live to fight Global Warming, rather than living handsomely off-of the fight of Global Warming, I have no funds or possessions for them to go after, and I've informed them of this, oh, except for $300 worth of laptops and some old, very dirty now, clothes.  They know where I can be found, and that even if I had the funds, I'd not fight them legally.  That is not my way.  That is not the hope for Global Warming's Death.  Fast.

I pray Lester Brown and EPI are bigger than this, and not, as my worst fears suggest, living off of the biggest threat ever to face humanity, rather than fighting to stop it, regardless of personal cost.

Loving

Deadliest Global Warming Denial - The Left Intelligentsia, of their Personal Responsibility to Stand

Deadliest Global Warming Denial - The Left Intelligentsia, of their Personal Responsibility to Stand

It's not nice to screw mother nature - Col - most houses burned ever

Wildfire destroys most homes in Colo. history

CBS News - ‎35 minutes ago‎

Updated 9:59 PM ET (AP) DENVER - Additional crews were arriving Saturday at a wildfire in northern Colorado that has scorched about 85 square miles and destroyed at least 181 homes, the most in state history.

Colorado wildfire ranks as most destructive in state historyReuters

1500 firefighters battle Colorado High Park FireSan Francisco Chronicle

Personal Trianer Introduction complete. Awaiting final comments on Book 2

http://youtu.be/7MDm-QYqJx4

Full book for download here: http://www.scribd.com/doc/95152089/Resurrecting-the-Insanely-Humane-Unviolent-Warrior-in-You-Fast-Draft-1f

Okay, so if you're an insanely humane warrior or insanely humane warrior want to be by whatever name, if you feel that you need to become the caliber of someone that did the freedom rides, many of the activists in SNCC, southern nonviolent coordinating committee, many in Tahrir square….  If you have the guts to realize that you may not be of that caliber yet, but are yearning to become that caliber then that's what this personal trainer is for.   I've had that yearning, I still have that yearning, to be better.  I've been burning with the desire to become something that could significantly, for one person, stand in the way of environmental Armageddon and by using, in essence, this tool for the last 10 months, I dramatically, dramatically progressed, as the lead video in this book sequence shows you graphically, the progress I made, and at the top of the spreadsheet, the Personal Trainer I'm about to show, there is a link to that initial video, these two live links in column B, the first two live links in blue that you see on your page, the first two entries

will take you if you're online, right to those videos.   And if you haven't seen them they are the right place to start, now.

I hope you've read the book one or several times, trying to drink in deeply the meaning of each of the 95 characteristics.  Those 95 characteristics are numbered here in column A, the numbers in column A correspond to the characteristic number in the book, and each of these links in blue in column B will take you to an online site that's been built with each of those essays.  So even after you've read the book several times and then begin using this Personal Trainer, you'll undoubtedly come to a title that just doesn't ring a bell, or don't ring clear enough, or that you disagree with; click on that link and it will take you directly to the essay.

Now a standard feature of Excel is that in a workbook there can be multiple pages, or tabs, along the bottom starting at the left.  Each of these sheets is of the same format in this trainer.  The first three are ones that I prefilled for thinking about each characteristic relative to what I know about Alice Paul, and two groups from the movie "Battle in Seattle," and that's what we've been looking at here.  If I click on the second, this I went through and thought about what I had seen in the movie Battle in Seattle, the people that I call the window smashers, I don't remember seeing them a lot, but there was one brief point. For me it was in stark contrast to the third tab here, which are the WTO Crane hangers, the male and female leads who we see early on dangling from one of the few things that makes me really scared, which is heights, and they are hanging from a really high crane.   I and my rating, if by any chance you can see this cursor, I rated it once,  I thought of those two characters once and I did a composite rating of them, scale of -5 being, oh my God, just totally on the wrong planet, pulling in the wrong direction, to +5 being, wow, nailed it.  Not with any thought of influencing you, except to empower you with my views for the window smashers.  Most of my ratings, which are on your sheet if you fire it up, starting in column F, I rated it once, going down through all 95 characteristics, and then I simply copied right to give you a better visualization - black areas are clueless -5,-4,-3 ,the most that I found for the window smashers was, oh, kind of neutral, zero, so it begins to get a lighter color there.  The numbers you put in which could be 4, 4.1, 4.2, -4.01... this is a gut rating, you can put in whatever you want and it will it will give you a visual representation from - 'in the dark,' black, to 'bright hot blue flame,' which is what you find with a five.

The crane hangers again, not to bias you at all friends but I think I owe you a picture of where my head is at.  You see quite a bit of blue flame when I think about the crane hangers from the Battle in Seattle movie you must see.

Incidentally, in each of these first three, which refers to movies that are available, hopefully you have them, hopefully you've seen them, but if you haven't, let's see, row six or so in the column D,E,F area,  here you would see a live link to where you could I get the movie Battle in Seattle, and in a similar place on the page you find the same thing for Iron Jawed Angels.  And for the fourth or fifth tab which is Freedom Riders. 

Now for freedom riders I did not at all go through and do a rating, because I wanted to give you in this case the opportunity to not have my input, to see the movie, and a link to it in row six  I believe, column F, watch the movie and then do your own rating for all 95 characteristics.  One of the tabs is of course, 'You."  

Now, if I haven't mentioned it, on each of these,  hopefully you can see that in column B, over to the right in row 2, you see a button called "insert new column.'  You don't need to do that yet because this first column D, which is in gray will is fresh and ready to begin to take your ratings.  So let's say you are rating yourself - the first characteristic is '001. Every breath square in harms way, shielding the innocents with my own body.  That's what the heart does.'  That's how the first characteristic reads.  'Wow, I'm really there,' you say to yourself.  I'm a '4.'  It just color-coded your entry, and it so happens that green, not black, not brown but green comes up for a '4.'  The second characteristic - '002. My theory is that the best time to cure a deadly epidemic, mass disease, mass insanity is now; well before it goes terminal.   'Wow, I'm really on with that.  I'm just staying focused and my sense of urgency is huge.  That's a 4.6 for me,' and 4.6 it's getting toward blue, hot flame.

This tool, and the color coding, is very much biased toward someone that probably like a Gandhi, probably like a King, almost has a binary rating scale for themselves -  A. I'm either what the world needs to see, or B. I might as well be clueless.  The point isn't to beat oneself up.  The point is to save our target clients.  So, the difference between a -5 and a zero is not going to get a whole lot of a color change, not much progress indicated; I mean, what's the real difference between a horrible doctor, and a really, really bad doctor?  It's going to be pretty dark really up through 3.5, or a 4, a 3 anyway, up through there is not much of a color change but from 3 to 5, is where we begin to be significantly hopeful to the world, then the colors accelerate in how much they change a relatively small improvement. 

So the third characteristic – '003. I'm being the change, I'm dying, totally giving up my life to save the world.'  

By the way, were all dying for something aren't we?  A date with that girl, recovery of my marriage, the promotion, the car, the meal.... At least in this society those are the things, but among the potent activists, INSHE warriors, they're dying for the suffering to stop.  They're dying for the injustice to stop.   They're dying for a future for humanity.  Were all dying for something friends.  We're literally giving everything we have for something.  So hopefully, you'll not be distracted by some sense of morbidness with my frequent use of such words as dying.

The twist of this is, the insanely humane, you know what, you know where their bodies are always?  Literally or figuratively they're in the way of harm, that's what the heart does.  That's what the good mom does, that's what the good dad does.  So, you know, if you find my language of 'dying' offensive, or morbid, then you probably are going to know really quick that this material isn't for you.  If on the other hand, you'll pay any price, any discomfort to try and do your part of saving the world from the insanity that's in the final stages of dooming us, you're probably going to be okay with the language, and eventually you may be pretty glad someone had the courage to remind us of what humanity does - it puts its body in the way.  To die?  No.  To be reckless?  No.  To save the innocents, to shield the innocents.

So, coming back to the Personal Trainer tool, next characteristic – '004. I'm being the change, I'm dying, totally giving up my life to be the change the world needs to see, and needs to be.'  'You know, I really don't think, I'm so distracted, I just don't have that mental focus, yet. I think that's a -2 for me now.'  So now we are getting down and into the in-the-dark colors.  Next characteristic – '005. I'm living, I'm fighting, I'm worthy because I'm dying for, every breath, I'm devoted to our neediest family, that's a Martin Luther King paraphrase.'  'Wow, that just doesn't apply to me right now. I get it.  It just doesn't apply to me right now. I'm about a -4;'  giving you an idea what the colors look like for the different numbers in the too.   So now we are in dark territory.

So that's the process.  Let's put in some values as though you had just completed all 95 characteristics for your first time, and now four hours later, you decide, 'you know what?  I want to go through this again.'  And by the way, that's the way I am in the first weeks of using a tool like this.  I don't have time to let slip by, my clients don't need me to 'try' but to win; I need to get fixed in my mind, I needed to become top of mind, top of consciousness with these characteristics, I need to reshape myself so they are part of me.   I just clicked the button that says 'insert column,'  it just put in a column with today's date;  it doesn't have time;  I don't know if we should be that anal about things right now.  However, you can have it automatically put in the time, just learn a little about Excel.   So here, you have a new column - it has pushed your previous rating, it's retained your prior rating, and pushed it off to the right.  So if you keep rating and adding columns your earliest ones will be pushed further and further over to the right.  Your most current ones will be more toward the left, right next to the black column, which is right next to the 95 characteristics; and it's all ready for you to put in ratings.

It's a real good idea that when you save your work the first time you "save as" instead of saving 'to' what I sent you, or what you downloaded, 'Aspiring Insanely Humane Personal Trainer,' putting your name at the end of the title, using 'save as,' and save it.  So now you'll have the original file in case anything ever corrupts your working sheet, so you could start over again.  Hopefully that will never happen.  (However, 'Jesus Saves,' and you should too.)  I strongly recommend however that every once in a while you do a 'save as.' 

So every once in a while, every four or five days that you've used this, and again do a 'save as' and create revisions for yourself.  So this is the one with your name, let's do a 'save as' on that as though you've been using this for five days and let's do an 'r1,' revision 1.  Call it what you want but every four or five days do that, this has a macro in it, you'll start creating a lot of data, and every once in a blue moon a spreadsheet will go corrupt, and you probably just don't want to lose the months worth of visual reference for yourself. 

And if you follow the steps I just recommended, including doing a 'save as' and adding your name so that you left the original file intact, freely go do some experimenting, some playing, see how this works.  See how the various links work.   Actually, why don't we do that now, see if we can get lucky, let's pull up the link 'my personal trainer,' I just click on that link, it takes us to an online version of the book,  insanely humane warrior.blogspot.com, to the 'intro to your personal trainer.' So with that you can go to the YouTube video which hopefully you've reviewed first.  But if you haven't, now is the time to do it.  It's a good introduction of the version of this, more importantly, to the process that brought me to the point where I could finally see this way to stop environmental Armageddon, this death fast, why I'm here in front of the Canadian Embassy, with the first weapon we've had that can actually, that can actually stop this.  Hunger strike, Self immolation, too weak.  All of this covered in something called, "Global Warming's Death. Fast," a book which can be found on both of the blogs 'Start Loving' and blog 'Tracking Plan B.'  So, this is simply to show you that the links are live.  This link brought up that introductory video which is interspersed with me, but also graphics interspersed explaining the tool again. 

Don't struggle with this friends.  I have tried to provide you plenty of good material, please go to it, use it.  If you're one of the ones reviewing this soon and now, then for the next three, four days I expect to be available on e-mail start_loving@yahoo.com and by all means feel free.  If you do your part of the work, and contact me and let me help you through, and then maybe you'll become trainer to others.

So 'insert column;' on several of these, you'll see links to movies that by God you need to see.  I'm sorry, you just need to see them.   Battle in Seattle, Freedom Riders, Iron Jawed Angels, absolute must sees. 

Limber up by seeing those movies or recalling them if you've seen them, and then giving your own ratings for each criteria, and if you like, look at mine, and if you don't want to look at the ratings I gave, delete mine, but limber up without getting personal to yourself first, by looking at independent references, Alice Paul, Crane Hangers, the window smashers, the Freedom Riders.   After you see that movie, using the next tab, think about the environmental movement today. 

You know, Eisenhower, Allied commander of World War II was known as a consummate planner, and he said, 'Plans are worthless, but planning is everything.'  Preparing the mind, shaping the mind, developing the mind, that's what this tool is all about. 

Godspeed friends.

'Loving, don't die, so that 200 billion might have Life.' HUH?

'Loving, don't die, so that 200 billion might have Life.' HUH?

Friends, IMPORTANT - Those having difficulty, pain... with Loving's Death Fast...

Friends, IMPORTANT - Those having difficulty, pain... with Loving's Death Fast...

I've continued to take modest calories to finish the books, and this will continue till they, and the audio versions are done.  I'll do a recount as to days when they are done, drop 2 days for every day I've taken calories from day 39 - I'm guessing the Death Fast Restart will be somewhere around day 10-17 or so, by that method - but whatever the math comes out to, tho I still look like day 30 or so.  I hope to restart by early next week.

A real good draft of "Resurrecting the Insanely Humane Unviolent Warrior in You, a Personal Trainer,"  1d, went out last night - Here, and for online browsing, and to interact with your Personal Trainer tool, here. The Personal Trainer tool should go out tonight, selected email, and blog posts.  I desperately need your immediate input, but I know of only one, maybe three that show any intention of doing so - I'll take what I can get, soon, and or go with what I've got already. 

As you know by now, I meant what I said day 1, "I can do my part perfectly well by myself.  I do not need support (tho when it is what helps the campaign, I'll gladly accept it; but not if it interferes.)  I'm sure that a Navy SEAL would say the same, and it would be true.  And YOU, in that which you are most practiced and competent, again, it would be true of you.  What I'm doing now I've been doing since my early 30's - it just looks different. I know the territory, I know me.

I also meant what I said on two other counts, day 1, in so many words, that are similar to each other:

1. I can't do what others would need to do as partners in this campaign -
qualified PR,
qualified Promotion,
Press,
securing those who will join;
and Securing an Injunction against violating my DNR, and Legal Advice regarding anyone that might either watch over me the final hours or days, or
take me to a place safe from Resuscitation if the Injunction doesn't come thru, and someone offers me a place to die).

2. I can't do what 1000 here on Death Fast can do.  But I can do what I can do, my part, regardless, and I'll joyfully do that.  I'm quite relieved that soon I can fully resume my most crucial part.

MY POINT:

Gandhi was emphatic.  It is far harder on those with me, than on I, when I'm in prison, or on hunger strike.

This is fundamentally and profoundly true.  Think of a movie where the central character is working to 'save the word.'  Lot's of movies to choose from, right?  Grade A, thru grade Z. We grimace, while watching,  right?  We ache.  We hurt.  But now think if the character.  Do they?  Think now.  No.

It is much, infinitely harder on the bystanders, the onlookers - Hell for them; Heaven for the one trying to save the world.

THE SECOND YOU NEED TO HATE ME, VILIFY ME, COMPLETELY DISTANCE FROM ME (I'M GUESSING ALMOST ALL HAVE DONE SO BY NOW), BE ANGRY AT ME... DO IT.  I'll love you no less, not one smidgen.  I want you do do what you need to to get thru this ok.

BUT, ONE LAST POINT - A REPEAT - I CAN'T FIGHT ON TWO FRONTS.  I AM UNABLE.  SO, IF YOU WORK TO GET ME TO STOP; IF YOU WORK ON OTHERS ASSOCIATED, WORKING ON THE CAMPAIGN, LOBBYING TO GET ME TO STOP, OUR DIALOG, OUR RELATIONSHIP, WILL STOP.  Out of anger?  Out of hate?    Out of need.  I will complete my part.  I'll not fail you in that.  And if terminating contact, fully, with you is necessary, that's what I'll do. 

Loving u all

Book 2, final revision for your convenience 1d

Online read and Downloadable here: http://www.scribd.com/doc/95152089/Resurrecting-the-Insanely-Humane-Unviolent-Warrior-in-You-Fast-Draft-1d

Hi.  about 25% of the essays are from book 1 - I hadn't proofed them - now I have.

I suggest you switch to the attached now, and if you've already made comments, suggestions, changes in a prior draft(s), just send me both(s)/all.

Soon I'll send you the personal trainer, and the very last part of the attached - last few pages on personal trainer will update, but not the 95 characteristics, except for your suggestions.

Loving

Resurrecting the Insanely Humane Unviolent Warrior in You. Fast. Draft 1d;

2 vid segments of the Livestream Interview - from Hope

http://www.youtube.com/user/HopeForPeaceNow/videos

Book 2 NEEDS your Review - Resurrecting the Insanely Humane Unviolent Warrior in you

Book 2 NEEDS your Immediate Review - "Resurrecting the Insanely Humane Unviolent Warrior in you. A Personal Trainer."

Here's the deal:

• Of the 95 characteristics, 95 essays, you have about 91.   Don't panic when you come to a blank page.  I thought I had them done, can't find those files.  Please, don't wait.
• You'll find a thorough introduction to the trainer, and more than enough reading before I get the actual tool in your hands by mid week.  I can't afford to lose any more blood to these mosquitoes tonight, so, by Wednesday.
• Maybe only 30% of the Essays have the link to their corresponding video log.  :-(  .  The videos are all up on yt chan StartLoving4, but the links will be incorporated in the next draft to you.

What is ahead? 

Uh, NOTHING that should delay your reading, and return of major comments to me.  Please.  Hurry.  Use word revisions if you have it.  Otherwise, just, using whatever software you have, make the comments, changes, corrections right in the book, and send to me, I have compare software that will show me what you've done, I expect. 

I haven't much time or energy left.  Major, high impact items, and small edits that I missed.  I don't want you to waste time.  I can't assimilate a lot of major revisions, or small detail stuff.  Just stuff that might not be to time consuming, and might make the content much more useful, or easier to read.  BUT REMEMBER PLEASE:  A.  I want this in my voice, weirdisms and all.  B.  This is not, is not, is not... a mass market book.  This is for the 2 in a million, 4 in a million, 8 in a million that are yearning to step up, and have maximal acceleration in doing so.  If someone wants to make a similar item for a broader market, let's talk!  But it will not be I that do it.

Yes, I'll be sending you a new Draft soon.  Don't wait, please.  Leave the burden on me if you get another revision and switch horses mid stream.  Just roll, and I will too.

Please read this, give me your feedback, fast, because by mid-week also I expect to give you a much better draft 6 of Book 1 - Global Warming's Death. Fast.

FYI, also online http://trackingplanb.blogspot.com/p/book-2-resurrecting-insanely-humane.html

Well, that's all I've got strength for tonight, and I'm likely to be a little slow tomorrow.

Loving

Looks like tomorrow, Sunday, night, book 2. Help?

Hi.  I just couldn't clearly see the end of this book 2 project, but now I can.  Barring any calamity, like being bled dry by these mosquitoes, or being too slow to escape threats like tonight's that I be arrested for using the same electrical outlets I've used all of the last 3 weekends (what was that about?),  Sunday night, tomorrow night, you will receive a really solid Book 2 that I, the next 2000 generations desperately need you to read, deeply, and to make whatever strong, negative or positive comments that you think can have a major, constructive impact on the value of the book.  All 96 essays, 96 character traits of history's effective, unviolent warriors, are 100% done, 6 are partial but need finishing touches, much or the preliminary credits, who is the book for, dedication... has been done.  A huge portion remains, the spreadsheet based Personal daily Trainer, but I've given that much thought technically, design, function... so I expect it to roll out quickly.

A day or two later you'll receive book 1, I'm quite sure, including incorporation of the one set of detailed suggestions I received, from Brian.  Draft 6, new dedication, new first essay targeted at Romm (Rome), Brown, Hansen, telling them among other things how they could save my life (Yes, literally.  I'm entitled to a little gallows humor.)

I'm functioning very well, and this is likely to continue at least thru the end of this week. Can't project beyond that.

Those that do a detail read of both books, will have probably qualified themselves to see if they think the Death Fast as currently planned and executed, can be improved, thought thru, and in all likelihood any thoughtful, deep, deep from the heart replanning from and with such individuals can be monumentally important, to the next 2000 generations.

Confidentially, Hope has reported what may be a monumental step forward - Lester Brown's organization's plan to begin blogging on the Death Fast - the first real spine shown by any of the global warming leaders, ever, except for Hansen under Bush 2.  Hasn't happened yet.  Let's stay quiet on it, and see.

Loving

Huh. No one told me it was Friday. Oh sh*#

I didn't realize till just now, so 6 hours of my 14 hours of battery life are locked in a coffee shop.  Weekends I have to leave to power in the evenings anyway, so no huge deal, but if anyone sees me gone by mid afternoon tomorrow and sunday, that's the deal, I'm up sucking electrons.

If you don't have a really, really solid book 2 by sunday, I'll be really, really surprised.  Am making great progress.

Loving

DF Day 30 - Is the LA Times makeing this up, or is someone helping them?

[IMPORTANT NOTE:  I don't know what happened here.  I don't.  But it is sooooooooooo typical of what happens.  So, I've chosen to put it out to you all, a massive risk (that the wrong people will misunderstand, and any perpetrator, if there is one, will use it for more mischief), but it has gotten to that point.  And if there is no basis in Truth, whatsoever for my concerns expressed and implied below, it is still a Godsend of an opportunity to tune up on a rarely unseen, rarely escaped, almost ALWAYS encountered risk in organizations, in groups of people working together.  And it kills worthy mission, after mission, after mission....]

To those that have had any direct contact with this campaign, as 'support,' requested or (usually) not, by me -

Judas, is that you?  No, the point isn't that I'm Jesus.  sadly, I'm not.

Where the Hell is LA Times getting this stuff?  This headline-

Environmentalist ends his hunger strike, says mass strike better  Los Angeles Times - 3 days ago. Environmental protester ends hunger strike at Canadian Embassy. ... the name Start Loving, is still camped out at the embassy, protesting the ...

Uh, I never, EVER, EVER HAD EVEN THE THOUGHT I was ending it.  I never SAID, or WROTE to ANYONE, that I was ending it.  Hmmmm.  '50% chance that in the coming weeks I could see a faster way of getting the 1000 here...' is what I said, and what I've written.

It ain't me that's giving them this stuff, and I'm the only one that has fully joined this campaign, so by definition, I'm the only one that could author it, in Truth.

The only other two authorized to EVER speak FOR this campaign to the press, or to anyone, per a prior email of several weeks ago are Brian and Hope, and I'm certain that they haven't and wouldn't make something like this up.  They are deliberate, not careless, and I don't recall ever seeing  significant ego in them.  I'm TOTALLY certain they are not authoring this falacious stuff.

It is possible that LA Times just makes it up, possible; horrifying, but possible - they are one of less than 5 publications I've found over the years that at all values the truth. Are they too now just infotainment?   The 1st article and then this, 75% of the stuff I don't recognize, sure didn't come from me, from the writing, the blogs, the book... from the extensive interviews....  HOWEVER, IT IS TOTALLY NOT MY RIGHT TO DICTATE OR EVEN TRY TO CONTROL WHAT THEY SAY.  I RESPECT THAT BOUNDARY WITH THE PRESS.  Will I have any more to say to them after this? I don't know.

But did they really make all this up, or is there a 2nd grade ego at play here, someone not authorized to speak FOR the vigil that is making stuff up for some grotesque ego gratification? I don't sense malice, but this would be excellent malice, too.  But I don't sense malice.  2nd grade ego run amuck.  Some of this has 2nd grade ego written all over it.  Someone failing to do important work themselves, desperately wanting attention, to be important... and essentially, stealing a spotlight generated by the radically committed, disciplined, mature, responsible work of another(s).

LET ME BE CLEAR:

1.  I have absolutely no moral right to tell anyone in the world what they can and can't say about this Death Fast, me, my writing, environmental science, US policy.....

EXCEPT.....

2.  I have the total, complete, absolute moral right, thus far, as the only person that has fully joined, and conducted 92% of the cumulative work of this campaign, from years of conceptual work to 24hrs/day for 50 days now... to author what is said FOR the vigil, and to authorize who may or may not speak FOR the vigil - Brian and Hope.

AND....

3.  I have the complete moral right to declare (what anyone with conscience or morality, operating above a 2nd grade level of maturity shouldn't have to be told) - you don't get to straddle the fence - IF YOU CHOOSE TO IN ANY WAY ASSOCIATE YOURSELF WITH THE CAMPAIGN, YOU WILL NOT SPEAK 'FOR' OR 'OF' (OR OF, OR OF, OR OF...) THE CAMPAIGN, UNLESS:
A. YOU ARE AUTHORIZED TO DO SO (just Brian and Hope thus far have earned that right, and myself), AND
B. YOU SPEAK EXACTLY WHAT HAS BEEN AUTHORIZED BY MUTUAL PRIOR DISCUSSION WITH ME (EXCEPT FOR THE LICENSE GRANTED BY ME FOR EXPEDIENCY EARNED BY THE CARE AND DUE DILIGENCE OF HOPE AND BRIAN), AND OR WITH STRICT, COMPLETE, ABSOLUTE ADHERENCE TO WHAT I'VE PRIOR WRITTEN OR EXPLICITLY WRITTEN.

For God's sake, is there really someone(s) that thinks this is some toy, this Death Fast, this campaign, the massive, disciplined, responsible effort that not they but another(s) have put into this, but in this the most crucial issue ever to face humanity, that thinks that this is some toy they can play with to gratify their own ego?  My God, I hope not.  My God, but that is so typical of the post 60's activist club, let's play 'activist' mentality, ultimately playing now with the lives of 200 billion?  Wow. 

For God's sake.

IF THERE IS ANYONE TO WHOM THIS APPLIES GET WITH THE PROGRAM, NOW, OR TOTALLY, AND COMPLETELY DISASSOCIATE YOURSELF FROM IT, NOW.  NOW.  IF THIS APPLIES TO ANYONE, CEASE AND DESIST, OR TOTALLY DISASSOCIATE YOURSELF FROM THIS CAMPAIGN, NOW, AND IF THEN YOU WANT TO AGGRESSIVELY TORPEDO ME, THE DEATH FAST, OR ANY FACET OF IT, I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY.  BUT BEING AT ALL ON THE INSIDE AND USING IT AS SOME EGO OBJECT?  MY GOD.

Loving