***** To the core of 6 or so individuals in DC government and nonprofits that I see working so honestly, courageously, humanely , intelligently, selflessly, in solidarity with the homeless and or poor in the DC region: I remain with you in spirit and gratitude, but my body, not so much. I'm called to Explorer For Life, Spirit, Humanity, reverence for life, Wonder, awe, willingness to stand for the next Generations... I'm called to explore and see if this exists in sufficient quantity in US to give........

To the core of 6 or so individuals in DC government and nonprofits that  I see working so honestly,  courageously, humanely , intelligently, selflessly, in solidarity with the homeless and or poor in the  DC region: I remain with you in spirit and gratitude, but my body, not so much.

I'm called to Explorer For Life, Spirit, Humanity, reverence for life, Wonder, awe, willingness to stand for the next Generations...  I'm called to explore and see if this exists in sufficient quantity in  US to give the next Generations a future. Sadly it is clear to me that it absolutely is not available in sufficient quantity in Washington DC, present company I hope, excepted.

I really have no hope that it's out there but it's the only thing that can save us if kindled or rekindled and I need to go give it a shot. My primary Mentor, the man Jesus, said, love as I have loved, and I shall continue to try to do just that,  for the nowhere else to be found joy of it. For the nowhere else to be found piece of heart of it. For the nowhere else to be found Hope of it.

It has totally absorbed me these recent weeks preparation including technical leading-edge enhancements to the Free Palestine Solar Fusion Bike Car Sailer. Hence my absence from the otherwise very important meetings.

Tomorrow morning as early as 3 a.m. to avoid the murderous DC traffic I expect to be pedaling My Way South. Plan A currently within me is to return by mid-november from the most southern portions of Florida before the weather gets too bad up here, for a few months rest, to briefly rejoin you, and to prepare for a year or so Journey.. But Plan B also seems to be quite active and that is to continue around the country for a year or several years doing what I can.

Again, as I reflect on this call with in my chest, the words of my brother Jesus come to mind, I came to bring a fire and oh how I wish it were raging. That's how I feel. I've got to continue to try. LOL. Yes, it is absolutely ridiculous. But I cannot not try.

It has been a privilege to work with each of you. You might think that I'm abandoning ship, or was never serious to begin with. I've never been more serious than in the work that I attempted to do alongside of you and it is exactly because of how important that work is that I am called to go do what I'm called to do.

I have come to think of what you  do as sort of the mash unit in the middle of the war. Unless some folks cause the war to stop the mash unit cannot succeed.

And stopping the war, stopping the war of soon terminal to all life on Earth mindless greed that we all in this culture consider virtue, will require an anti-violent army. I must go see if one can be raised.

James

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Despite cancer, Jimmy Carter plans Habitat trip to Nepal

http://www.cnn.com/2015/09/30/world/jimmy-carter-nepal-habitat-for-humanity/

Lol. Remember, no good deed will go unpunished. Anonymous. Do good deeds anyway, for the infinite joy of it.

Lol. Remember, no good deed will go unpunished. Anonymous. Do good deeds anyway, for the infinite joy of it.

I wish I had [more] people in my life that deeply and intensely Loved me exactly because of how sane I have become. Of course, it has been the opposite......

I wish I had [more] people in my life that deeply and intensely Loved me exactly because of how sane I have become. Of course, it has been the opposite. And I am 100 percent okay with that. It has been my active, deliberate, incessant choice to pursue sanity with all of my might, sensing clearly what it would cost me, as it has. I remake the same choice, greedily, with every breath.

SPDF Day 52-1: The North Star of Joy in my experience and study that we totally reject, obscure, belittle, bury... in our sickest of societies... is Meaning... Serving the Neediest from the Soul in Solidarity.... more

The North Star of Joy in my experience and study that we totally reject, obscure, belittle, bury... in our sickest of societies... is Meaning... Serving the Neediest from the Soul in Solidarity. I'm sharing my Treasure, not lecturing or preaching. All I'm saying, if you, or your loved ones, responds to Meaning, to Being of True Service, then I simply pray you make that of highest priority, and yes, I know that if you do, that makes things no easier at all, because we relentlessly destroy as a society the opportunity for near ANY OF US to lead meaningful lives... but to whatever small degree you can nudge in that direction... it cures a near infinite number of other issues spiritually, psychologically. Hugs. You are doing your best. Please find the peace of heart in that.

nd. Be with the Creator and you'll have Peace, Wisdom, and Joy... each breath that you do so..

Be with the Creator and you'll have Peace, Wisdom, and Joy... each breath that you do so..

***** A puppy from Heaven. vid. 5 min

vid. 5 min. EMT - in dozens of cases almost none fear their imminent death. Peace and acceptance.

vid. 2 min. Taking care with how we spend our 'beans' (years). ..... I reject the premise. 15 years ago I decided to stop wasting my 'beans' on EVERYTHING except Loving and Caring For my Global Neediest Family. FOR THE INFINITE JOY AND PEACE OF HEART OF IT... I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS. STOP WASTING YOUR BEANS, LIKE I DID.

I reject the premise. 15 years ago I decided to stop wasting my 'beans' on EVERYTHING except Loving and Caring For my Global Neediest Family.  FOR THE INFINITE JOY AND PEACE OF HEART OF IT... I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS.  STOP WASTING YOUR BEANS, LIKE I DID.

***** I am wealthier than any but one in a million in history that I see, wealthier in joy, loving, piece of heart; and yes, destitute, when it comes to the wealth of men, which is worthless in the kingdom of God. I am not talking religion here, I am talking human experience, I am talking my experience, I'm talking physiology, psychology . If there is any wealth worth having beside joy, loving, piece of heart someone needs to let me know. Otherwise, they might want to learn from my example as I continue to learn from that of others. 100 percent lived solidarity, serving the global neediest, from the soul, regardless of any personal price for doing so.

I am wealthier than any but one in a million in history that I see, wealthier in joy, loving, piece of heart; and yes, destitute, when it comes to the wealth of men, which is worthless in the kingdom of God. I am not talking religion here, I am talking human experience, I am talking my experience, I'm talking physiology, psychology . If there is any wealth worth having beside joy, loving, piece of heart someone needs to let me know. Otherwise, they might want to learn from my example as I continue to learn from that of others. 100 percent lived solidarity, serving the global neediest, from the soul, regardless of any personal price for doing so.

posted from Bloggeroid

nd. When earlier in my years I was becoming a technically world class skier, there were mtns that terrified me, made my stomach churn... until I learned to metabolize them. Every moment my life is agony... refusing to turn away from, choosing to sprint toward... the world's horrors. But I've learned to metabolize them, devoting my life to gain this capacity, so my life is Heaven, and HELL, each moment. Near-pure Loving, every breath, the most profound Peace, and Agony. The agony AND the ecstasy.

When earlier in my years I was becoming a technically world class skier, there were mtns that terrified me, made my stomach churn... until I learned to metabolize them.  Every moment my life is agony... refusing to turn away from, choosing to sprint toward... the world's horrors.  But I've learned to metabolize them, devoting my life to gain this capacity, so my life is Heaven, and HELL, each moment.  Near-pure Loving, every breath, the most profound Peace, and Agony.  The agony AND the ecstasy.

nd. Every waking breath of my life is 'peace' precisely because I refuse to not fight, to not serve, in lived solidarity, from my soul, for my most suffering Family. It is the only real peace possible, physiologically.

Every waking breath of my life is 'peace' precisely because I refuse to not fight, to not serve, in lived solidarity, from my soul, for my most suffering Family. It is the only real peace possible, physiologically.

***** pic. The Purpose of my Life is the total, complete, absolute devotion of every breath, every resource... to the neediest you can possibly reach... for the unmatched, sublime, total, complete... inner peace and joy of that way of being. Serving, from the Soul, in absolute, Lived... Solidarity with the global neediest. Full stop.

The Purpose of my Life is the total, complete, absolute devotion of every breath, every
resource... to the neediest you can possibly reach... for the unmatched, sublime, total, complete... inner peace and joy of that way of being. Serving, from the Soul, in absolute, Lived... Solidarity with the global neediest.  Full stop.

***** “We’re each a cell in the body of Creation; nothing more, nothing less, nothing else. We’re here to advance the wellbeing of Creation, with each breath; nothing more, nothing less, nothing else. For the Joy of it, the Peace of Heart, the Loving, the Life... of the Attempt. That’s all there is. That’s it. That’s the opportunity. That’s the Path.” Loving

“We’re each a cell in the body of Creation; nothing more, nothing less, nothing else.

We’re here to advance the wellbeing of Creation, with each breath; nothing more, nothing less, nothing else.

For the Joy of it, the Peace of Heart, the Loving, the Life...
of the Attempt.

That’s all there is.  That’s it.  That’s the opportunity. 
That’s the Path.”

Loving

***** nd. Cancer Update: "During the time of my depression, I had forgotten what extreme pain is everpresent in Loving in this world. I was in the alternate fantasy world of overprivileged separation, self-centeredness. Then the pain of meaninglessness, solitude, un-loving... smothered me. And now I seem to have dug my way back to Humanity, Creation... Sanity, extreme pain for Creation, and all - Peace of Heart, Sanity, Meaning, Life, Joy." Loving

***** nd.  "During the time of my depression, I had forgotten what extreme pain is everpresent in Loving in this world.  I was in the alternate fantasy world of overprivileged separation, self-centeredness.  Then the pain of meaninglessness, solitude, un-loving... smothered me.  And now I seem to have dug my way back to Humanity, Creation... Sanity, extreme pain for Creation, and all - Peace of Heart, Sanity, Meaning, Life, Joy." Loving

***** detail. Re yesterday's post re 'Peace,' a beloved sister, KK, wrote: Either god is walking up to the pitcher's mound and asking you for the ball or all that you have worked for has come to fruition. Until then, there is the struggle. Is that what you mean?... detail

***** detail. Cancer Update: Why would I,( or anyone,) want 'Peace' when I could be dead in a few da

KK: Either god is walking up to the pitcher's mound and asking you for the ball or all that you have worked for has come to fruition. Until then, there is the struggle. Is that what you mean?

Loving: What a dear question, intelligently framed, from my beloved sister KK, on a point, that for me, is overwhelmingly important. Hmmm. 

My central point is that what I was taught in Short Hills, divorce yourself from, isolate, distract, separate yourself from, physically remove yourself from, the world's problems... is exactly Death of the Soul, of one's Life. We are designed, as is ALL HEALTHY TISSUE, to RUN TO THE EMERGENCY - the Family Emergency Response, I've called it. 

KK!!!!!! You are the first person I've known since I was a child that might know this scene, that is the only scene I know of that remotely captures the point!!!!! This is sooooo cooooooooool! THE FANTASTIKS!!!!! Round and Round on the Carousel, I think the song is called? PUT ON THE MASK, Gallo tells our sheroine. Invariably when we say 'Peace' to each other, it comes down to 'put on the mask!' Take the drug, get drunk, go to the movie, have the dinner, expand the house... while today, 26,000 of your children NEEDLESSLY starve of water and food, and die, on a planet that produces enough food for 11 billion people every day. That is walking Death, raging, terminal, Affloholism. I know. I was born and raised to it, and existed much that way for 45 years, tho, as did the sheroine in Fantastiks, I always had a horrible hunch that it was Death. 

Now, the very center, the essence, of my infinitely Joyful, infinitely Painful Spiritual Life, is to keep, every breath, every beat of the heart... the very Spirits of those 26,000, and those like them, at the center of my being. They are the Fuel of Life, the Fire that stokes the Boiler. 

As to your beautiful imagery above - Less than any day in my life, do I think the Creator is about to bring everything to fruition (see pic below). I pray for a global economic meltdown, to slow Titanic II. I'll probably, near certainly, live thru Thursday's operation, but my personal preference would be to not. Like John C, in The Green Mile, every day for me is like chewing glass. I'm ready to rest. 

But that is 100% up to Creator, whatever She decides, not me. 

The only hope for humanity is to race, with all the speed possible, back to the happiest, most joyful and healthy, humans have ever been - 100 years before Columbus arrived here in America; or 100 years before Europeans arrived, in Africa; and I don't see a snowballs chance in hell of that happening - quite the opposite.  Now everyone on earth wants the biggest mask they can find; to become a donkey on Pleasure Island, just like Terminal US.  

(((HUGS)))

 

Cancer Update: "Gods peace be with you as you enter this scary week. Thinking of you, Leon." Loving replied, ":-) God's Peace IS with me. I have not had, nor will I have .00001 seconds of being disturbed. If he wants me home, I'm more than ready. If he wants me here a bit longer to Work, to Serve, I'm ready for that. 'Fear not that which can destroy the body, but not the Soul. Fear only what can destroy the body and the Soul." That's how it is with me, every beat of my heart. I'm in His Kingdom, more than a decade now, the Heart, the Soul, and that's how it works there, no longer dwelling in the Flesh - just as we were told, just as we were promised. (((HUGS)))"

Cancer Update: "Gods peace be with you as you enter this scary week. Thinking of you Leon." Loving replied, ":-)  God's Peace IS with me. I have not had, nor will I have .00001 seconds of being disturbed.  If he wants me home, I'm more than ready.  If he wants me here a bit longer to Work, to Serve, I'm ready for that.   'Fear not that which can destroy the body, but not the Soul. Fear only what can destroy the body and the Soul."  That's how it is with me, every beat of my heart.  I'm in His Kingdom, more than a decade now, the Heart, the Soul, and that's how it works there, no longer dwelling in the Flesh - just as we were told, just as we were promised.  (((HUGS)))"

06.06.13 D Day. Two mild panic attacks last night as I slept... (detail)

Two mild panic attacks last night as I slept.

Each one awakened me.  Extremely mild.  Automatic.  My fleshly spirit trying to take over.  Near instantly I successfully worked to reestablish my being which is entirely to advance the well being of my 204 billion children, and as quickly as it arose, the attack subsided, near completely.

When you chose a certain path to walk today were you attempting to avoid the alternatives?  Probably not.  You were simply choosing what you wanted, the most.

And so it was with my panic attacks last night.  They reminded me that my nervous system, in automatically choosing to indulge the spirit of my flesh, was making a less preferred choice for me.  So I then made a better choice.

This spirit of my flash is surely on heightened alert prior to the 11:00 AM meeting today at Georgetown Hospital.  I believe now that my soul, the spirit of my heart, is more than up to the task of keeping my fleshly spirit from taking control.  We shall see.

What I want, through all of this, is to keep the well being of my 204,000,000 children as the center of my being, as my reason for existence.

Successfully, so far, I have refused to make it my concern as to what I am told today at the hospital.  I can't control that, I can't influence that, therefore it is not my business.

Oh, I have a preference.  My preference is that they'll say that they can give me many years more to serve my children.

I'm taking  particular care to use my book, personal trainer (see Library Tab), to keep the spirit of my heart as ready, strong, sharp, in charge, as possible today.

vlog Thursday is D DAY for Loving's Cancer

Thursday, 11:30, cancer consult at Georgetown Hosp.

***** nd ' "Freedom," worthy the name, is Loving, that is, Freedom of Conscience, Heart, Soul, from Tyranny of Flesh, Head. THIS is the aim of All TRUE Religion.' Loving

***** nd ' "Freedom," worthy the name, is Loving, that is, Freedom of Conscience, Heart, Soul, from Tyranny of Flesh, Head. THIS is the aim of All TRUE Religion.' Loving