Surgery was a success.
3 hour operation began at 11am, I
was waking in Recovery by 4:30pm and in my room by 6pm. Little pain when I am stationary, huge pain
if I cough (rarely occurring), they've prescribed pain meds that seem to manage
that well, too.
Great, kind, compassionate, attentive, responsive, highly
trained medical team. Thanks to
Obamacare it is available to me.
Had one of the six or
so nicest surprises of my life today, that I can remember (so profoundly and
deeply sorry to any of you that have been so deeply kind to me whose extreme
kindness I may be forgetting at this moment, but I'm particularly overwhelmed
by this one). Please blame it on the
pain narcotics they are pumping into me.
The five others, in no particular order:
* 55year old Gerry and early 20’s John, in their suburban
neighborhood, running hugely loud power tools on the lawn, till 2am... cutting
me a hugely heavy Cross... for me to
walk with 200 miles to DC... to raise action to Save Darfur;
* Beverly nearly 'ripping the throat' out of a pastor she
saw should try and rescue me from an extreme hike, while on hunger strike, ‘the
most ‘Christian thing she’d every seen’) for the criminally disadvantaged children
of Chester PA;
* Dave and Mary
Rachel bringing their new young son X from PA (where they work 7 days per week)
to see me when I was living on the streets of DC so I could devote myself to
averting global warming;
* Cathy driving from
PA, just moments before hurricane Sandy was to hit DC where I was living on the
streets fighting Global Warming... to rip me off of them, to safety, braving
the leadinng edge of Sandy all the way back to PA for me, with me;
* My dad... for the 28 years or so before his death...
standing by me, giving me everything he had to give... despite the near total,
embarrasing, zero of a person I objectively was at that time....
Oh, I could go on with another 5, or more. Most people never see such Love even once in
their Lives... I've been criminally, entirely, undeservedly over-privileged in
this (and every other ) way.
[Side note: It is important, crucial... to periodically reflect such instances of Pure Loving in one's life, and or, such instances one knows of, even if in literature... for THIS is where we've seen God, the Creator, the Divine... Loving... and they must be the Star we steer by to be, become, and do the same... with every breath.]
The potential of my physical death has never been a concern
for me, except as a provider to physical dependents (offspring, woman I was
married to), and now, as a possibly consequential fighter for my Family in
Palestine. But personally, hey, you go
to sleep, don't wake up, the ride, your 'turn,' is over. What is the big deal? So the tiny but real risk of death from any
substantial surgery, such as mine this morning, was no concern to me.
Cathy, my sister in Pennsylvania, to whom I was married for
decades, offered, weeks ago, to come down, and I knew she wanted to, and it was
from her heart I was sure... but I said the idea was ridiculous... bus picks up
and drops me off literally at the curb... of the hospital and my homeless
shelter... no, I said... too much time, too much money... too much carbon...
zero point or need. And that was the end of it.
Didn't hear from her since... our lives are in near totally different
directions.
Signing in at the hospital this morning I gave Cathy’s name and my friend Jim from VA, authorization
to retreaive my stuff, in the uunlikely event I croaked (with prior instructions to them that what
meager 'stuff' I have go to the world's greatest activist Diane Wilson for her
work) But to the question 'is anyone
here with you?,’ and ‘who to call in case of a problem?,’ 'no one' was my
reply, as always, with which I was 1000000000000% at peace. I hate resouces going in my direction… the
purpose of my life is to get Loving resources flowing to my Neediest Family for
Chists sak! I was asked the same
questions, and gave the same reply when I was in final prep, just seconds before being sedated and put under for this 3
hour operation. 'No one,' and 'no,’ answers
that are such a non issue to me, so habitual for so many years now… I gave them
no thought whatsoever.
Three hours later, after what seemed like 30 minutes tops to
me, I was in recovery waking up, "Your ex-wife (I hate the term) Cathy is
here when you are up to see her."
I'm having trouble seeing the screen, and typing, as the sobs of wonder,
Joy, amazement, warmth... come back to me, many hours later, as I type this to
you. I don't recall ever, ever, ever
being so overwhelmed with such a Loving act, incomprehensible… Divine.
'I wasn't sure you would be 'ok' with me coming, she said, but I needed to be here, and if upon seeing you you wanted me to leave... I was 100% prepared for that... but I needed to be here.'(and return on the six hour round trip drive).
