Ma'am, pleasure and happiness don't do it for me anymore. They never did but I didn't understand.

Several days ago on a low traffic highway, wide shoulders, Very cold and rainy. James very wet, ahead of him pulled a brightly and attractively  Decorated small car. Reasonably current. And respectfully but annoyingly stopped 30 yd ahead of saul on an slight uphill grade. Yes, the usual reaction by James was annoyance. But quickly it fled. James pulled ahead of the vehicle probably concerning the individual who stopped that he was going to go by. Rather he just thought it bad process to allow slow saul to get stopped behind another vehicle. Potential danger. James stopped the vehicle and after a 15 seconds of shuffling around on the dashboard out stepped a Mid thirties female.

We had the most Pleasant Exchange. I don't know why I stopped you, she said. I don't know why I'm doing this mission, James replied. I don't know why I'm doing what I'm doing, James replied with an honest smile. This is how it is when we have the soul in charge.

 I'm cold, I'm wet, I'm very tired, I'm frightened, but I just can't sit and watch while americae destroys children whose skin is not white like mine and eyes are not blue like mine because they're desperate for safety from the countries of theirs that we have destroyed. 

 Her body language indicated profound empathy. It is escaping James at the moment from this encounter of several days ago what prompted him to reflect in reply, Joy is what I do this for. Happiness, pleasure, warmth, safety, are in the other direction. Many decades I tried it. It doesn't do it for me. It never did. But the courage of my convictions I did not have until about 20 years ago and have ever since for the joy of it. If the best I can do is try and awaken one other soul in whatever days I'm given Then that's what I'll do, for the joy that making the attempt to gives me, each breath. You have stirred mine, she replied obviously meaning it and very glad of it.