I've never before come close to a 100% psychotic break, as I did upon awakening in the OR, Oct 18, my birthday.
But I have come closer than ever before, since then, one or two occasions, also drug induced.
My work is sooooooo isolated, so profoundly isolated, from folks that breathe, these last 15 years or so, because the Real Activists are mostly long dead - for decades and centuries, and 1000's of years. So, it is not my fault, but rather an affirmation, that I am so isolated -I'm willing and able to pay the price - living with the Real Activists in books, and my imagination.
But ooooooooohhhhh the danger. And in what extremely important, life and death, winner take all, is it not fraught with danger??????? Right.
But the Responsible, Master, Practitioner, works all the harder then to see and grasp what shreds of reality, and unreality, exist in the current time.
My encounter last week, and my encounters in dreams the other night, are very frightening to me, because of the harm I could play a role in happening to the worthiest among us. I must work to learn to see the impossible to see boundaries, every day, getting better every day, so if and when I am called to Lead, I do it from Reality.
But you seem to have a grasp on what is real to you now....and what could have been or was medically induced then and now and going forward as you heal.....so stay in the present....and heal so you do not have to take a lot of medicine. Will have to look up Lovenox....an anti-cancer drug ?? Hope you have as few side effects as possible. Glad you are taking Zantac...it should help alleviate the digestive, belly issues....hope your system is "waking up" and restarting !!
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