***** In terminating the death fast I have despair not joy.

I so wanted to believe that the future could be saved. I closed my ears to the greatest of all, Jesus. For so many years. The gate is narrow few will enter in.

He was not correct because he was Jesus he was correct because he was the greatest sear we've seen.

But he did not quit, but rather he fought for the individual revolution of loving. He found it worth one by one trying to save the one in a million from the hell of the fleshly life. I shall use every remaining breath to try and do the same.

I am tempted to feel like a failure. I am tempted to feel defeated.

But I am only defeated if I fail to face the truth.

I may want to save 200 billion, but if that's not possible yet I still try, then I failed the one, or two, or three who I might have saved by redirecting my efforts.

And this I believe I will do now.