Gross-out alert, ahead: Have you ever resided where the bathroom was 15 minutes away...

A. When you had exploding diarrhea?

B.  'A,' when the bathroom was closed from 6pm till maybe 8am?

Was it the hard boiled egg, or sandwich, from my nice sat am church folk?  

Butt cheek muscles, I love you. I'm forever in your debt.  Don't fail me now.