When I restart the Death Fast....

When, maybe 'if,' I restart the Death Fast:

1.  Over the next few days I expect to be posting my thinking, here.  So, if you wish to know my thinking, you'll want to check this link, or better yet, subscribe to the daily summary.  I do not expect to repeat what I post.  If one is interested, they can read, and then we can discuss.  Billions of lives depend on our every second, and I for one, will waste not a one, as you should demand of me, and yourself.

2.  I'm not open to arguing, but with those of you that have earned it through your kindness (you know who you are) I am open to some further discussion and clarification, and to hear your thoughts, now.

3.  But when (if) I restart, one of the things I've learned is that I can't retain the clarity I need for that part of the work if I allow ANY dialog.  So, if there is to be any talk, NOW is the time.  Once, if, I restart, other than what I've written, said, and blog, there will be zero communication, internet or in person.

I've been holding at the body-weight of Day 15, measuring my calories daily, verified on the scale this past Wednesday - 157 lbs, for me.  When, if, I restart, I may start at zero, or Day 15.  Not sure yet.

Yes, I am riding a bull, riding a roller coaster, sailing in a storm - external and internal. Detach, if and when you need to.  I'll think none the less of you.

I experience my fits and starts this way - if my kid were pinned under a car, and it was only me that was there to get it off - I wouldn't know how, I'd grab this way, I'd grab that way, I'd try this, I'd try that, and I'd keep trying, I'd recognize I was failing, but I wouldn't stop trying, and trying new ways that seemed promising.  That's how it is with me.