SL here. A note to my 3 Friends.

Our words are so inadequate for all that is of consequence.

The word 'despair' is the best I can think of to describe what I'm feeling with respect to the future, the IMMEDIATE, and ETERNAL future of Humanity, Earth, Creation.  Anything less than despair

and I'd be quite a dead husk of a creature, and/or delusionalas to how bleak it is.  We don't have a technology problem, a resource problem, an energy problem, a social science problem.

We have a Heart problem, a Soul problem, a Humanity problem, a Sanity problem, clinically.  The problem with the world 'despair' is that it suggests debilitation or dysfunction.  I'm quite fully

functional, but yes, I feel despair, deeply.  

As to the outlook for my actions - in crisis, we only learn by diving  in - all Revolutionaries of Change, of Love, of Humanity, they dive in  first.  And so it is with me, and this is the choice I continue to make.  When the notion of ceasing food and water for days, weeks, months...  years (if they kept me on life support) came to me, I examined it  carefully, tested it, and when it seemed Right, seemed sound, I  moved in that direction, and alerted you.  Only when one leaps  into a situation can further, accelerated learning happen.  What  I may be learning, once again, more deeply, with more data,  more experience, is that
A.  In a graveyard, 2011 US, such a move is relatively  pointless;
B. I've been correct in recent months to place ALL hope,  for whenever there might be of Hope, in Insane Humanity, that  many of  us evidence from time to time, and that one out of a  million come to and Live with every breath.  (I like the term   Insane Humanity - it really captures, but like all our language,  'denial,' and our other defenses can trash it real quick. )  Therefore,  it may be that I am to serve by moving more deeply into, resigning  myself much more fully to living in a 'cave,' my ever increasing  solitude, isolation... devoting myself to the possibility that  directly or indirectly I ever meet someone that is desperate  to give their Insane Humanity control of their lives, but need  help in taking that step.  It may be that my primary responsibility  will be preparing centrally for such a moment, that I fully don't  expect to come. 

With amusement, and seriousness, the  image of Obi-Wan stays with me, and the WLODI (Wage Love  or Die) Warriors.  All hope, ALL hope lies in this.  Jesus would  agree I think - he and his hand-picked apostles were the equivalent.  I don't think He ever foresaw that more than one in a million of  us would find Life - our Insane Humanity.  I've resisted, and still do, this notion, but  that is out of cowardice and denial on my part.  "Many  are called by few choose to follow."  "The gate is narrow, and  few will enter in."  The Insanely Humane is who He meant.  Who do you know that fits this description?  Harriet Tubman  did, and Eleanor Roosevelt, Mother Jones, Dietrich Bonhoeffer,  Jesus, Assisi, Teresa..., the Insane Humane.  1 in a million.  The Yeast.  The Levin.  The Mustard seed.  The Yeast isn't the  bread, nor the Levin.  The seed isn't the tree.  They are but  trace elements.  I hope I'm wrong, but objectively, I think not.  And now there is no Yeast, no Levin, no Mustard Seed. 

There is a good chance that Christmas eve I'll begin yet another  hunger strike, but probably taking liquids, able to live off of body  fat recently acquired, but not much, for maybe 15-40 days.  I  foresee being much in front of the White House, possibly playing,  over and over, the Plan B 3.0 W/O the BS video, audio I'm half way through  creating now; for my own education / development, and for the rare passerby  with any Heart for Humanity.  In effect I must be on my 10th  reading of Plan B 3.0, and every day I read other sources on the  subject, too.  I'm not stupid.  And really, I'm not all that slow a learner.  The scope, scale, degree of the horror that we humanoids of  2011 are condemning all of creation to, forever, is vast, so unimaginable,  so totally overwhelming... that it takes so long for it to sink in.  Think Eternal Holocaust.  Studies reported conclusively that the  Germans were all very 'nice,' 'normal' folks.  And so are we.

My feeling that it was right for me to advise you three of my  plans has pretty much left me, I think.  I can and do manage  my work on my own.  I experience myself like a Space Probe,  fired off into the unknown, sending back what it sees, for whatever  Good that might do.  I expect to continue my practice of doing  so at my Blog, if you ever have interest.  I've pretty much discontinued
posting to my FB page, or YouTube (except as a video repository)  as these are pretty much sites of all talk, all spectating, no  action. 

Brother, my Will and Testament, should they ever be needed, will  be on my person, and will mention you as the point of contact for  any belongings on my person, and you know my intent that anything
I have be liquidated and proceeds to Diane for her work.  I'll probably  soon find, and resend the copy from last time so you have it.

xx sl

Note of interest:  Jesus, and Obi-Wan, for that matter, there came a point  where they served better by allowing their life to be taken by the raging  inhumanity around them, but not until there was, were, those of latent  Insane Humanity assembled that it might ignite.  I don't see that.  Yet.  "No one comes to me except that the Father brings them."  Maybe it is  for me to wait, prepare, get ready, in the unlikely event....